Ninety.

Remember Them Days? That's what it used to be. But that there I promise aint me.

Lately thinks have been different to say the least. Like life is having its way. Hopefully things go in my favor. I've tried my hand at prayer and getting more spiritual, and I've been consistent about it, so hopefully it goes right. You know how we folks are. A little something goes bad in our lives and we turn to God to fix them. But I never said I was perfect. I can only try right? So that I do.





Moving forwards, I've been doing more reading of peoples blogs than actually making my own. And its always interesting to hear what other people have on their minds, because I tend to have plenty on my own. I even went out and spent $40.00 to get Documents to Go on my Blackberry so I'd have all of the blogs ideas and thigns I want to write about in one location and be able to edit it and everything from one source. Then just post it on here. I wish Blackberries just got a damn Blogger app. That'd be the life. Especially since Wordpress has one.





I've also been considering a new layout. Hopefully Jeanetta has some time on her hands to do it for me because I do not know how to do it. Speaking of Jeanetta, she made me realize two things in her latest blog over on http://semi-literate.blogspot.com/





#1: I don't like wasting my time, and I dont enjoy meandering in pointless, drawn out situations.


and


#2: I don't like to keep friends with old sex partners. I need change like Obama, and keeping you around under the label of friendship is a hinrance of my overall goals.





Prime example being Interim. Loved her to death. Time spent was great. Sex was something to marvel, and her personality just grabbed me. We tried the 90 day thing, but couldnt make it 45. So as a result I've implemented the same rule Netta has. Three Months.





Basically in three months of fucking, talking, hanging out, talking, people should know exactly where they want to be with a person. If not "be" [because you know people don't commit anymore. That word can make roaches scatter], it gives you a consensus of where you two should be, either together or apart. It's not that much of rocket science if you think about it.

"The three month rule is mutually beneficial. I believe strongly in cutting off things before we get to the point of no return. The point of no return is that fine line. One side is us, happy with good type relations betwixt us. On the other side is me pissed and arson"

Can you honestly go against that word? I cant. Committment, or the thought of it is weird for people. And even at 22, I know what it means. Comitting to someone don't mean forever unless you make it. But being 22 doesnt mean "hey, I'm still young, I have plenty of time". [I personally hate that quote]. At 22, I've had more women in and out of my life than a Victoria Secret on Semi-Annual Saturday. Any man that enjoys doing this forever is a fool. Ginuwine was a bachelor, but now he has a plethora of rugrats. So anybody acting like being a player forever is good is a fucking fool.

But basically after the three months, when you buckle down and you tell your partner "look, it's been a while, shit needs to progress". Dont misconstrue partner with somebody you sporactically see and spend time with on occasion. I have had a few of them. Girls who as long as you dont "publically" act like they arent the only girl...they are cool with that. I've had a girl tell me "I talk to too many". So what I did was told her less, and gave her less evidence. Even though nothing changed, things changed for her. But it was COOL for her to pubically make a proclamation for singlehood, and the occasional "I need a man". Thats just the way of the world. But on my side of the street you'll get ticketed for Jaywalking.

Women do get mad when men go after and and everything at arms reach, but can't be mad because they never "wanted to put a ring on it" as Beyonce would say [I've always wanted to say that. That deserves a video]



Moving North, As Netta says, --> "Bitch... you done bamboozled yourself. You were headed distinctly down a path that you liked and were comfortable with and the next thing you know, he pulls an okeydoke. Now you wandering down a shitty dirt road, shoeless and squinting cuz you think you see a light at the end of this shit. Don't be simple. Them ain't lights hoe. Thems is fireflies and ain’t nothin ahead of you but more bullshit.

Bamboozlement = Bullshit and Bullshit eventually = the possibility of arson... "

The 3 month rule saves lives

Thats it...Ninety.

50 Mistakes We Men Make In the Bedroom

Fifty Mistakes Men Make When Having Sex

Just in case you thought the route to sexual bliss was straightforward, here's a list of things to avoid. They're all pretty much guaranteed passion killers for a woman - and if your check list contains more than ten of these, you've got some serious work to do on your sexual etiquette!



















1 Going straight for the naughty bits


You've got to be sensitive to the fact that a woman is more likely to be irritated than aroused when a man dives for her breasts and vulva after a few minutes' perfunctory kissing. While you might get to feel the goods, you're not going to be invited back.





2 Not knowing how to kiss sensitively

Passionate or sensitive, firm or gentle, good kissing is an art form which lubricates the wheels of sex and gets everyone in the mood for more intimacy. Learn how to kiss, and do it well. That doesn't mean sticking your tongue in her mouth and wiggling it around like you're trying to floss her teeth.



3 Being too rough when you touch her erogenous zones


Men like a firmer touch than women, especially when it comes to our penises. So if you touch her clitoris with as much force as you apply to your penis when you masturbate, she's most likely to howl with pain - and then kick you out of bed. Remember: the clitoris has twice as many nerve endings as the penis, in a much smaller area. Treat it with respect. It's the only organ in the human body that has no function other than to provide pleasure.

4 Not stroking and caressing her


A woman's second biggest sex organ is her skin. (The first is her mind.) You can make your touch on any part of her body into a sexy caress, but you have to focus on what you're doing and put some sexual energy into your fingers while you caress her. That means not thinking about the baseball game while you're giving her a sensuous massage.

5 Locking onto her nipples like a suckling child


Yes, we know it's fun for you. To her it just feels like she's got a teething infant hanging off her breast. Lick and kiss around her whole breast before you go for the nipple, then flick your tongue gently across the nipple and around the areolae. If she likes what you're doing, you'll know by her moans of pleasure.

6 Biting on her earlobe because you think it's sexy


She may not agree with you. In which case it will just be irritating for her, not a prelude to her turning into the sex goddess you thought you were summoning up.

7 Leaving a hickey on her neck like a teenage badge of honor


If you're over sixteen, this is a no-no. If you need to know why, you're obviously under sixteen.



8 Not shaving before sex


When you're in the throes of passion, having your beard stubble brushing back and forth across her face isn't so sexy, but at least it'll produce a red rash she can remember you by.

9 Not washing your pits and bits before you have sex


If there's one thing that turns women off, it's a lover whose personal hygiene isn't up to scratch. Even though men have a higher smell threshold than women, keeping yourself clean - especially in the more intimate corners of your anatomy (like under your foreskin) - is not just a matter of courtesy, it's a ticket back to the bedroom.

10 Forgetting she has a sensuous body waiting to be stroked


Pretty much the same point we already made up above, but worth remembering: touch doesn't just have to be in the bedroom, a prelude to sex. In fact, if you touch her a lot in a loving way during the day, she'll be ready to melt into your arms by bedtime.



11 Trying to get your fingers in her underwear before she's ready


This is the mark of a gauche teenage lover who wants to get to fourth base just so he feels more accomplished as a lover. Take your time, let things evolve naturally, and apply a little sensuous touch on the fabric covering her vulva before you dive under the elastic. The hint of what's to come is often more erotic than diving straight in there.



12 Dropping the condom on the floor


Must we say why this isn't the most popular move post sex? Dispose of the condom tidily in a tissue - put it in the bin rather than down the toilet, or it's likely to float there for some time to come as a reminder of your sexual encounter.

13 Going straight for the clitoris during oral sex or masturbation


Like we said above, most women just find this irritating - and, if you press too hard, bloody uncomfortable too. Your first caresses should be on her labia, the lips of her vulva, then as she gets more aroused, you can work nearer the clitoris itself. But even when she's aroused a soft touch along the sides of her clitoris may be more acceptable for her than any pressure on the head of her clitoris.

14 Breaking off just as she's getting to the point where she wants you to keep going at all costs


Women often get so lost in their sexual arousal that they forget to give feedback. In reality, the fact that she's lying there quietly may actually mean she loves what you're doing; if so, you should feel her pressing her vulva against your mouth or fingers, or shifting like she wants more touch, rather than giving you a sense that she'd rather be out shopping.

15 Undressing her clumsily


Listen up guys: you don't have to be able to take her bra off with one hand, behind her back, while kissing her. In fact, in my experience, it's better if you don't try. She probably puts it on by fastening it first and pulling it over her head anyway. Let her take off the garments you don't understand, and whenever you do lend a helping hand, undress her gently and sensuously rather than pulling at her clothes like you're ripping the paper off a birthday present.



16 Undressing yourself inelegantly - which includes taking your socks off after your underwear


Nothing is more comical (or pathetic) to a woman than a man in his socks and pants. Except possibly a naked man wearing socks. If you don't understand why, just accept that it is so.



17 Expecting her to shave for you


You might like the baby smooth look around her vulva, but she's more likely to see this as a prickly route to itchy stubble. Ask her nicely if you'd like her to go smooth. If she says "no", accept that graciously.

18 Sticking a finger up her vagina before she's ready, willing and able


In general, women do like to be penetrated just as much as men like to penetrate, which, considering how much men like to stick things up there, is just as well. However, she'll only want you to do this when the time is right - i.e. when she's aroused enough to enjoy it. If you're giving her clitoris attention, there'll be a point where she might like to have a finger or two inside her. If so, be gentle, and start with one finger on her G-spot. Make sure she enjoys this before you put another one up there. Two fingers on her G-spot is probably as much as she will want. And be just as firm with your touch as she finds pleasurable. If you don't know what the G-spot is, then do some Google-ing before you get into bed.



19 Entering her without asking her first


What is it with men and these dark, wet places? Just keep in mind that she decides how far sex goes, and if she doesn't want to enjoy intercourse then don't press the point. This applies especially to any strategy that involves nudging your penis into position and then pressing forward without her consent, verbal or otherwise! Having said that, you don't always need to ask "May I enter you?" though it can be a romantic and sexy thing to do if you're looking deep into her eyes. Needless to say, that's most likely to happen in the man on top position, which, by the way, remains everyone's most popular position for sex.



20 Pecking away around her vagina with your penis if you can't find the way in


This is, by all accounts, many women's least desired sexual moment. If for any reason you can't get in, don't pretend you're in control and keep trying. Simply ask her to guide you in with her hand. That way you'll save a lot of embarrassment, not to mention time.

20 Pumping away without regard for her pleasure


When you've achieved your most desired objective, and your penis is inside her, you'll want to show a certain consideration for her pleasure. She may want hard and fast thrusting, but it's best to start slow and shallow. While you're making love, she'll most appreciate your efforts if you're masculine and strong - which is to say, if you act like you know what you're doing, you're considerate and gentle at first, and work up to firm and strong thrusts if she likes them.

21 Expecting her to make love bottom up


Yes, we all enjoy rear entry. But she may be more self-conscious of her butt, she may feel like a sex object, and she may not like the rather impersonal nature of this position. If you really want to do it, and you explain to her why you like it so much (i.e. "It's incredibly exciting to see your gorgeous bottom as we make love", rather than "I get so turned on fucking from behind") she'll probably co-operate from time to time, even if it's only on your birthday and hers.



22 Thrusting too hard


If you happen to be well-endowed, or she has a short vagina, and you thrust too hard, you may end up banging her cervix. This can make her shriek, though sadly not with sexual pleasure.




22 Coming before she's got excited or begun to enjoy sex


There aren't many men who can last long enough to really satisfy a woman who enjoys vaginal intercourse and G-spot stimulation. If you can't be bothered learning how to be a long lasting lover, then at least have the decency to keep going for a few minutes so she gets some pleasure. This isn't hard, and there are plenty of ways you can learn to extend intercourse and not come so quickly. Do some research on Google for "end premature ejaculation" . See also number 26.

23 Not coming at all - or losing your erection when you put the condom on


If you're one of that rarer breed of men who has trouble coming during intercourse, may we respectfully suggest you see a sexual therapist? You can then deal with this problem, learn to come more quickly, and avoid giving her a numb vagina and an intimate knowledge of the exact shade of color you painted your bedroom ceiling. If you're one of the many men who lose their erection when the condom comes out of its foil wrapper and onto the head of your penis, it's back to Google for a search on, surprisingly enough, "losing erection when putting on a condom".

24 Asking her how it was for her


This is not the mark of a confident lover, so if you really want some feedback, phrase it thus: "Did you prefer it when I did X or Y?"

25 Not going down on her when she wants oral pleasure


Since oral sex on a woman is so pleasurable for most men, this seems unlikely. But if it's a question of the smell or taste being a bit much for you, try taking a shower or bath together before sex. If you just want her to fellate you and you simply can't be bothered to reciprocate with cunnilingus, then reading these tips isn't going to help you much anyway.

26 Failing to give her pleasure if you come quickly


Remember the motto: "Women come first!" As a man, you're probably going to lose interest in sex once you've ejaculated - at least for a while. In which case, make sure she comes through oral sex or masturbation before you enter her. That way, she gets her pleasure and so do you. (With the added bonus that it doesn't matter so much if you shoot quite quickly.) Just to enter her, thrust a few times, come, roll over and forget about her is the mark of a boorish lover, and you wouldn't want to be one of those, now would you?

27 Trying to force her head towards your cock


Let's face it: she's either willing to give your oral sex or she's not. Trying to persuade her to get her lips around your glans by edging her head towards your groin is a bit crass, to say the least. If she doesn't seem to be heading that way as things hot up, just ask her: "There's something you could do that'd give me so much pleasure.... ."

28 Trying to force her head further down on her cock when she's giving you oral


Yes, once again we know it feels good, but you have to be considerate about it. She's not likely to be a deep throat expert, and there's no reason why she should be, since most of the pleasure of oral sex comes from the action of her tongue on your glans. Keep your hands away from her head unless it's to gently stroke her hair, and you won't feel the temptation to encourage her to go deeper.

29 Holding her head when she goes down on you


Pretty similar to number 28, but this time, holding her head and moving it up and down on your penis is the no-no. If you think that's acceptable sexual etiquette you've been watching too many of the wrong kind of films.

30 Coming in her mouth without asking her if it's OK


The taste of semen is very much an acquired taste; unfortunately it's one that few woman ever acquire. If she doesn't like it, ask her to keep going until the last minute, then tell her when you're going to come so she can move back and finish the job with a well-lubed hand. You'll get just as much pleasure, and she won't have to gag or spit your semen out. By the way, accidentally forgetting to tell her you're going to come is not permitted.

31 Thinking that a porno movie has anything to do with real life


Porn is not good for men's egos. Real life isn't like that, OK?

32 Switching on a hard core porn film without asking whether that's OK with her


Even if you find it arousing, she's not likely to, for the simple reason that much of the porn available today is fairly abusive to women. Ask her first, and if you want to share the erotic thrill of watching people have sex, get hold of some romantic sex movies that will appeal to her emotions as well as her sex drive.

33 Apologizing for the size of your penis


Just in case you ever feel inclined to apologize for not matching up to the guys in the wrong kind of movies, just remember: 98% of women would rather have a sensitive lover than one with a big penis. If you're with one of the other two percent, you need to find a new lover.

34 Answering honestly when she asks you what your last lover was like


Guys, when a woman asks you if her butt is too big, do you tell her the truth? Enough said. Your current lover is always the most gorgeous, sexy and desirable woman around. Even if she doesn't really believe it, that's what she wants to hear.

35 Asking her if she'd mind if her girlfriend joined you


Threesomes can be exciting, but they usually just cause jealousy and upset when one partner unexpectedly finds they don't want their partner making out with another person. Needless to say, this usually happens to the woman. So be sure, be very sure, you know what you're doing before you try this one.

36 Making her do all the work


Changing positions is all very well, but asking her to ride you each time you have sex seems a bit one sided. Vary the positions, have fun, and take equal shares of the work. Don't just settle for one favorite position and flog it to death.

37 Trying to slip it in the back door by "accident"


Anal sex is something that a lot fewer couples have tried than you'd believe from what you read on the internet or see in porn. It's something you might like to try, but you both have to want to do it. She's not likely to respond with warmth if you keep pretending you're poking her anus by accident. And she won't believe you if you tell her you just didn't want to ask for directions, even if that's how you are when you're driving around lost, looking for somewhere.

38 Photographing or videoing your lovemaking


Unfortunately, as many jilted lovers can testify, taking pictures while you enjoy sex is putting power in the hands of the person who has the pictures. A good compromise is to link your video camera direct to your TV without recording the images. That way you can have the erotic thrill of seeing yourself during sex without having to worry about seeing yourself having sex on the internet in a few years' time.

39 Getting into the same old same old routine every time you have sex


Above almost everything else (except possibly being deeply in love), ringing the changes when you make love is the thing that will keep your sex life fresh and passionate. You'll be surprised just how exciting it can be when you try a new position. This is simply because every position puts a different pressure on the penis and vagina, or gives you a new perspective of your partner's body, or perhaps allows you to see entering your partner's body, and so on. Exactly which sex position feels most pleasurable will depend on the shape and size and shape of your penis and her vagina.

40 Not romancing her


Women love romance. Men put up with it, or do it to get sex. True or false? Probably true, but the romantic "chase" is deeply rewarding for most men (i.e. seducing and winning a woman makes us feel deeply fulfilled), and romance is an essential part of that process. If you're able to continue being romantic once you're an established couple, then you set yourself head and shoulders above the rest of your fellow men, and you stand that much greater chance of getting regular, passionate sex.

41 Slapping her buttocks without checking if she's into a little dominance play


No mater how exciting you may find the idea, don't land a heavy slap on her butt without trying a few lighter ones first and seeing how she reacts. If you do, you may get a slap in the face. Or a kick in the balls.

42 Trying to do sex by the book (or the film)


Don't copy the moves you see in porn films. They lack a certain something. Consideration for the woman, that would be.

43 Playing with her anus before she's excited enough to appreciate it


When you're masturbating her clitoris, and you have a finger inside her vagina, you may find that she responds well to a little anal play. If you have the position right, you can use your little finger to tickle gently at her anus as your forefinger plays with her G-spot. This may well add to her excitement - especially if she's on the verge of orgasm. If you try this before she's really excited and has stopped caring what's happening to her, you might just turn her off completely, so it might not be a bad idea to check it out with her in advance.

44 Deafening her by shouting in her ear when you come


An easy mistake to make, especially if you like to have sex in the man on top position lying close to your partner, and you like to let the world know when you come. Unfortunately she won't let you do it a second time, so bury your face in the pillow or something if you're prone to uncontrollable vocal ejaculations as well as physical ones.

45 Talking dirty without checking if she likes it


Generally a little consensual dirty talk between adults adds to the excitement. The first time your partner tells you to f*** her hot wet c*** you'll see what I mean. If that hasn't happened yet, and you'd like it to, encourage her to talk dirty to you when you're making love, and see what pops out of her mouth. You might be surprised. Remember legend has it that the quiet ones are often the most surprising in bed!

46 Lying on top of her without supporting your weight on your arms


Always remember: a gentleman takes his weight on his arms. Or elbows, or knees, or something.

47 Ejaculating on her without asking permission


Coming between her breasts or on her vulva or bottom can be incredibly exciting, but it's nice to ask her first. She may see it less a mark of your ejaculatory prowess or manhood than a mess to clear up.

48 Not controlling your ejaculation


Like we said before, a good lover makes the effort to make sure his partner is satisfied before he is.

49 Not spending some time with her in your arms after sex


A man who gets up after he's done the business and sets about his daily routine is probably top of most women's sexual dislikes. For her, this is a special time when a woman feels very close to her partner. She takes much longer to come down from sex than a man does, she wants to know she's loved and special, and she wants to feel adored by the man to whom she has just given her most precious asset. The very least you can do is to spend a half hour or so cuddling her while you relax after making love, even if you're not going to spend the night with her.

50 Not cleaning up after sex


And since sex inevitably involves a certain amount of fluids, keep the tissues handy for afterwards. If you feel like being chivalrous, offer her a warm towel to clean herself, especially if you aren't using condoms

The Sixteen [16] Commandments of Man.

I. Never say ‘I Love You’ first

Women want to feel like they have to overcome obstacles to win a man’s heart. They crave the challenge of capturing the interest of a man who has other women competing for his attention, and eventually prevailing over his grudging reluctance to award his committed exclusivity. The man who gives his emotional world away too easily robs women of the satisfaction of earning his love. Though you may be in love with her, don’t say it before she has said it. Show compassionate restraint for her need to struggle toward yin fulfillment. Inspire her to take the leap for you, and she’ll return the favor a thousandfold.

II. Make her jealous

Flirt with other women in front of her. Do not dissuade other women from flirting with you. Women will never admit this but jealousy excites them. The thought of you turning on another woman will arouse her sexually. No girl wants a man that no other woman wants. The partner who harnesses the gale storm of jealousy controls the direction of the relationship.

III. You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority

Forget all those romantic cliches of the leading man proclaiming his undying love for the woman who completes him. Despite whatever protestations to the contrary, women do not want to be “The One” or the center of a man’s existence. They in fact want to subordinate themselves to a worthy man’s life purpose, to help him achieve that purpose with their feminine support, and to follow the path he lays out. You must respect a woman’s integrity and not lie to her that she is “your everything”. She is not your everything, and if she is, she will soon not be anymore.

IV. Don’t play by her rules

If you allow a woman to make the rules she will resent you with a seething contempt even a rapist cannot inspire. The strongest woman and the most strident feminist wants to be led by, and to submit to, a more powerful man. Polarity is the core of a healthy loving relationship. She does not want the prerogative to walk all over you with her capricious demands and mercurial moods. Her emotions are a hurricane, her soul a saboteur. Think of yourself as a bulwark against her tempest. When she grasps for a pillar to steady herself against the whipping winds or yearns for an authority figure to foil her worst instincts, it is you who has to be there… strong, solid, unshakeable and immovable.

V. Adhere to the golden ratio

Give your woman 2/3 of everything she gives you. For every three calls or texts, give her two back. Three declarations of love earn two in return. Three gifts; two nights out. Give her two displays of affection and stop until she has answered with three more. When she speaks, you reply with fewer words. When she emotes, you emote less. The idea behind the golden ratio is twofold — it establishes your greater value by making her chase you, and it demonstrates that you have the self-restraint to avoid getting swept up in her personal dramas. Refraining from reciprocating everything she does for you in equal measure instills in her the proper attitude of belief in your higher status. In her deepest loins it is what she truly wants.

VI. Keep her guessing

True to their inscrutable natures, women ask questions they don’t really want direct answers to. Woe be the man who plays it straight — his fate is the suffering of the beta. Evade, tease, obfuscate. She thrives when she has to imagine what you’re thinking about her, and withers when she knows exactly how you feel. A woman may want financial and family security, but she does not want passion security. In the same manner, when she has displeased you, punish swiftly, but when she has done you right, reward slowly. Reward her good behavior intermittently and unpredictably and she will never tire of working hard to please you.

VII. Always keep two in the kitty

Never allow yourself to be a “kept man”. A man with options is a man without need. It builds confidence and encourages boldness with women if there is another woman, a safety net, to catch you in case you slip and risk a breakup, divorce, or a lost prospect, leading to loneliness and a grinding dry spell. A woman knows once she has slept with a man she has abdicated a measure of her power; when she has fallen in love with him she has surrendered nearly all of it. But love is ephemeral and with time she may rediscover her power and threaten to leave you. It is her final trump card. Withdrawing all her love and all her body in an instant will rend your soul if you are faced with contemplating the empty abyss alone. Knowing there is another you can turn to for affection will fortify your will and satisfy your manhood.

VIII. Say you’re sorry only when absolutely necessary

Do not say you’re sorry for every wrong thing you do. It is a posture of submission that no man should reflexively adopt, no matter how alpha he is. Apologizing increases the demand for more apologies. She will come to expect your contrition, like a cat expects its meal at a set time each day. And then your value will lower in her eyes. Instead, if you have done something wrong, you should acknowledge your guilt in a glancing way without resorting to the actual words “I’m sorry.” Pull the Bill Clinton maneuver and say “Mistakes were made” or tell her you “feel bad” about what you did. You are granted two freebie “I’m sorry”s for the life of your relationship; use them wisely.

IX. Connect with her emotions

Set yourself apart from other men and connect with a woman’s emotional landscape. Her mind is an alien world that requires deft navigation to reach your rendevous. Frolic in the surf of emotions rather than the arid desert of logic. Be playful. Employ all your senses. Describe in lush detail scenarios to set her heart afire. Give your feelings freedom to roam. ROAM. Yes, that is a good word. You’re not on a linear path with her. You are ROAMING all over, taking her on an adventure. In this world, there is no need to finish thoughts or draw conclusions. There is only need to EXPERIENCE. You’re grabbing her hand and running with her down an infinite, labyrinthine alleyway with no end, laughing and letting your fingers glide on the cobblestone walls along the way.

X. Ignore her beauty

The man who trains his mind to subdue the reward centers of his brain when reflecting upon a beautiful female face will magically transform his interactions with women. His apprehension and self-consciousness will melt away, paving the path for more honest and self-possessed interactions with the objects of his desire. This is one reason why the greatest lotharios drown in more love than they can handle — through positive experiences with so many beautiful women they lose their awe of beauty and, in turn, their powerlessness under its spell. It will help you acquire the right frame of mind to stop using the words hot, cute, gorgeous, or beautiful to describe girls who turn you on. Instead, say to yourself “she’s interesting” or “she might be worth getting to know”. Never compliment a girl on her looks, especially not a girl you aren’t fucking. Turn off that part of your brain that wants to put them on pedestals. Further advanced training to reach this state of unawed Zen transcendence is to sleep with many MANY attractive women (try to avoid sleeping with a lot of ugly women if you don’t want to regress). Soon, a Jedi lover you will be.

XI. Be irrationally self-confident

No matter what your station in life, stride through the world without apology or excuse. It does not matter if objectively you are not the best man a woman can get; what matters is that you think and act like you are. Women have a dog’s instinct for uncovering weakness in men; don’t make it easy for them. Self-confidence, warranted or not, triggers submissive emotional responses in women. Irrational self-confidence will get you more coochie than rational defeatism.

XII. Maximize your strengths, minimize your weaknesses

In the betterment of ourselves as men we attract women into our orbit. To accomplish this gravitational pull as painlessly and efficiently as possible, you must identify your natural talents and shortcomings and parcel your efforts accordingly. If you are a gifted jokester, don’t waste time and energy trying to raise your status in philosophical debate. If you write well but dance poorly, don’t kill yourself trying to expand your manly influence on the dancefloor. Your goal should be to attract women effortlessly, so play to your strengths no matter what they are; there is a groupie for every male endeavor. Except World of Warcraft.

XIII. Err on the side of too much boldness, rather than too little

Touching a woman inappropriately on the first date will get you further with her than not touching her at all. Don’t let a woman’s faux indignation at your boldness sway you; they secretly love it when a man aggressively pursues what he wants and makes his sexual intentions known. You don’t have to be an asshole, but if you have no choice, being an inconsiderate asshole beats being a polite beta, every time.

XIV. **** her good

Fuck her like it’s your last fuck. And hers. Fuck her so good, so hard, so wantonly, so profligately that she is left a quivering, sparking mass of shaking flesh and sex fluids. Drain her of everything, then drain her some more. Kiss her all over, make love to her all night, and hold her close in the morning. Own her body, own her gratitude, own her love. If you don’t know how, learn to give her squirting orgasms.

XV. Maintain your state control

You are an oak tree. You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, fuck tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. She will rain and thunder all around you and you will shelter her until her storm passes. She will not drag you into her chaos or uproot you. When you have mastery over yourself, you will have mastery over her.

XVI. Never be afraid to lose her

You must not fear. Fear is the love-killer. Fear is the ego-triumph that brings abject loneliness. You will face your fear. You will permit it to pass over and through you. And when your ego-fear is gone you will turn and face your lover, and only your heart will remain. You will walk away from her when she has violated your integrity, and you will let her walk when her heart is closed to you. She who can destroy you, controls you. Don’t give her that power over yourself. Love yourself before you love her.

"Dont fuck with them Red bitches. They'll have you suicidal."

I've come to the conclusion light skinned women can do NO wrong. At least by me. In my 22 years of living, I've dated [yes, I counted], 217 women. Some were day by day, some had a few months.. But MAJORITY of them were light skinned. Why? Because they can do no wrong. Like you can put a light skinned woman in a turban and gloves.. and even though you cant see her face... you KNOW she has to be half decent. Wild shit right? Its a fact. Name an ugly light skinned celebrity you've seen?

Like fuck..Look at Danger from that Ray J joint. Tattoo on her face... Smexy. Not sexy, but Smexy. I wouldnt hit it raw, I'd put a rubber on it, then a paper bag... but I'd still hit it. BUT...Imagine Fantasia with the same face tattoo. That shit dont sound as sexy, now do it? Precisely.

Now, I love me a brown skinned girl.. Dont get me wrong. I'd wife Gabrielle Union in a heartbeat.. But some shit about light skinned women turns me on:

• How they turn red when you smack them on the ass.


• The fact they can wear red lipstick [pet peeve] and get a pass.


• Black toenail polish on light skinned joints looks somewhat normal. [wild as shit.. but its a fact. I aint met a dark skinned female with black nail polish I liked. Whoppi tried it.. she did, but nah nah. *Ugh... Flashbacks of when her and that white dude from Cheers kissed]


• Even when they are not UGLY.. they make up for it somehow.

Now.. ALL women do this, dont get my wrong. I'm NOT Yung Berg's choreographer, or his admin assistant. I have a preference. I love all women though.. [got THAT shit out of the way to be political].. But moving right along...

I've heard Brown Skinned/darker joints call light skinned women "Red Bitches"...FUNNIEST shit ever.

I dont discriminate...no not at all.

Facebook deleted me. Not once, but three times. So I'm taking it slow, this round. Lets see how long I'll last.

Other news..

Reality just set in, I'm bipolar. I figured this out after a conversation with Morgo last night after I got back in from my date [outting, I apologize], with "her". She does'nt have a particular name right now, so she'll just be labeled she. "She" can change next week, because they seem to change quite often anyway. Not my fault. Digress. Morgo tells me about dude she's been talking to, and how he's pretty much acting like a skirt because he seems to be competign with his ex by dangling her [Morgo] around in her face like a trophy. At first thought, I'm like "Ok, dont females LIKE making the ex jealous?". But this isn't the first time this month I've heard this being the case. Its just the jones'.

Spring is finally here, which pretty much means

• A lot of people are going to try to portray shit that they arent. This is prime season for taken men to re-do their rosters to find better bitches for the summer. He put up with you all winter, hibernatign, but the club notifications on Facebook are going to start up in April, so you know he's bound to get out.


• Females will claim to want to be single and "enjoying" the single life. This is a double negative. Nobody is "comfortable" with being single. Especially seeing their taken friends have options. Its a psychological game with women. They like to be single Friday and Saturday nights, until they realize they are going home alone from the club, while all their girlfriends are making calls.


• *Points Up* Yeah yeah.. you'll think "Okay, well she can make a booty call. But what self respecting woman YOU know is content with just being the pussy for the evening? Feel free to give her my number, I'll give her my friends numbers, and she'll be a statistic. Sorry, but yeah..


• The Preview of the Summer. A LOT of people were NOT prepared for last weeks weather change. That 60 degree burst of heat got to them, they're walking around with flip flops and North Faces. Turn around 7 days laters, every single one of them is sniffling with colds. Not to mention women's name games were horrible, and the decline in outfits at the club have been minimal. Seems like females are like "You cant go wrong with leopard, black, or red dresses." Be different.

Around this time last year, I hated the club, you could'nt get me to go. And I found out the reason why. I had reliable pussy. Its simple people math. You go out, get dressed, hit the club, gawk and stare at women all night, and your chances of pulling a source are slim and none. ME on the other hand, every Friday and Saturday, I was promised sex. Good sex if I must say so. Why did I ruin that by breaking it off? Because all good things come to an end. And I took pussy for granted. Sucks now getting in the house at 4am, looking at paper statements of a $40.00 tab for 4 drinks, tipping a bartender, and leaving out with just a buzz.

Want to hear about something that scares me? Titty fucking. Like I cant put myself in the position to sit on a females stomach and place my dick between her breasts. That has to be the dryest place on the planet other than Beyonce's reproductive organs [as Keri Hilson tells us]. Like who comes up with the concept of titty fucking? Faggy shit.

Speaking of Fags [gays, queers, homosexuals, I dont know whats acceptible to call them, sorry.]..But me and "her" were in the movies watching Watchmen last night, and a group of them are in an empty theatre, running around, acting like 8 year old barbie doll toting boys. So shes int he cut fighting back words, looking at me like I should say something to them. Now, contrary to popular belief, just cause they are gay dont make them any lesser of a man. And I refuse to lose a fight to four fags. I'm sorry, shit just wont never happen. So I let the shit slide for a good 15 more minutes, and I get tired of her doing her sidebar shit too..

1. Moaning and sighing


2. hand to her face covering her mouth


3. Mumbling curse words

So I just said fuck it. I walked up to them and was like "Not trying to bother y'all, but me and her trying to watch the movie.". One of the bent wrists was like "oh, I'm sorry sir, my bad".

• I hate when people call me sir.

They are quiet. I get back to my seat, and her face changes as if I discovered how to make her orgasm with two strokes. She sits upright, FINALLY. She's smiling, and says "Good job". At this point I dont even care, I'm watching the movie. Plus for the past 45 minutes she's been real tense like, so I didn't bother getting too close to her. I'm what you could consider "rebounding". Her and the dumb nigga stopped talking because he opted to keep pursuit of the ex girl [kind of like Morgo's dude], and she stops talking to him. As a result her and me start talking, and getting to know each other. She's not my girl, I have my options, I'm sure she has hers. I call sparingly, text on occasion. Same with her. Its quite entertaining. Lets see how it goes..

On another note, I have a sex drive that is wild. I wont go into details, but I sat through two full length orgy pornos last night after returning from the movie, and umm.. Yeah.. I did'nt go to sleep until 3:30. I'll let you fill in the blank.

Women: When a man tells you he masterbates, its not because we are trying to get a nut off. Well...in my defense, I get mine in daily, regardless if I'm hitting skins or not. It prolongs my real-life bedroom action. It's like a Wizards game, they have a shootout, and practice before the initial game. Same way with me. I dont want to get on the court and be winded and flacid by the halftime show. You dig?

Marinate off that though.

Fin'

The Agreement:

This shall be posted, and sent to random partners. The contract should be self explanatory.

Sticking to my Convictions

My boy told me "Greg, stick to your convictions". I think that was a suitable title to this.

My party went better than expected. Fell in love in the span of 5 minutes With Ms. Travel Girl. Shook at the fact shes opting on moving instead of staying where she belongs. At least thats where I feel she should be. Hurts that someone with so much potential is constantly on the run. Something tells me she runs from her problems instead of dealing with them. That shouldnt be. Call me sweet on her, but fuck it. We've spoken for months now, and JUST met Saturday. Shit is crazy that way, I guess. But things also clicked. *pause*

Okay, I had to turn off that sentimental music, it was making me go on a tangent, and getting off track to where I was going. Moving along.

After much debate, I figured I'd go ahead and take a hiatus for a little while. Clear my head and get some shit together in my own personal life. There are more than enough blogs so far for the year that people have to catch up on, which should cover my ass until I decide to come back and have something to say. But right now, theres too much shit on my conscience that I cant get over:

- CBS currently is "heads over heels" for somebody. Dont know if I started actually liking her... or if I just want to fuck again.
- Ms. Travel Girl [probably never spoke on her].. Shes difficult. Asked a question of her yesterday, no reply. So I just said fuck it, charged it to the game. can only play the fool one time.
- "Therapy" [spoke on her before, but had to change her name due to conflict of interest. We still chill hang out, but shit just is... cant even explain it.

Some shit I'll just keep to myself to reserve comments being thrown my way, and people feeling like I've slandered their names [females]. A close mouth dont get fed, but it wont get me in trouble. I'll take that option.

Who knows when I will have something to say. I have damn near 17 blogs just ready to post.. But I'll save them for a rainy day. Hopefully y'all will continue viewing, and reading all the old blogs.

Gone.

How I feel: "I Can't Win".

I think Usher is letting us know something with the title of this song…

Usher - I Can’t Win.




Sometimes I get that I can’t win feeling. So I must say this song is a winner in my book. Especially since it gives me that compromising feeling, like the particular one that I'm having today.

So... Chris Brown Fucked Rihanna UP

Pelvis Thrust: Mrs. Money of the Day: Selma Hayak

Like seriously.. SOmething about Selma Hayek is just gorgeous. I will like every part of her. Minus the.. yeah.

I digress. Shes the Pelvis Thrust of the day.

My scrotum just broke my jean zipper looking at her. CHRIST SAVEEEE ME!

"Why Squared"

Took a note my boy Keyon did, and started to ask... "Why" my damn self. This is a section that I'll probably do weekly, every Friday.. with 20-25 Questions that I have to ask.. "why".. Here goes.

1. Why do women praise big dicks, then complain about it hurting? Nothings perfect.
2. Why do women complain about dick sizes period. Lay there, shut up.
3. Why whenever I hear about someone doing a drug outside of X pills and weed, I instantly think of a white person? [Racist as that sounds, I know I'm not the only one.]
4. Why did the lady at H&M tell me that men put baby powder on their thighs in order to slide in and out of their skinny leg jeans?
5. Why cant women have the complete package?
6. Why the fuck Mystikal aint out of Jail yet? Its been like 8 years... okay.. 7, but still.
7. Speaking of Seven. Why did he stop being a choreographer for Bad Boy? Hmm..
8. Why does Mountain Dew make me run to the bathroom 15 minutes later? YELLOW 5!!!
9. Why the fuck my blackberry dont have "threaded SMS" like the iphone?
10. Why am I a virgin again? I need poosie.
11. Why do I have a feeling I'm going to grab a whole lot of random women and dance with them Saturday?
12. Why aint YOUR ass going Saturday? Hmmm...
13. When you aint talk to me in a while, and you see me active on Facebook.. why the fuck you try to pick up where we left off? I dont fuck with you no more girl. Go Thaddaway---->
14. Why do I feel like Suge & Diddy know who killed Tupac & Biggie, but wont say nothing?
15. Why do Ray J & Nick Cannon keep getting the baddest bitches? Yes Im hating. Fuck that. Christina Millian? Kim K? Mariah? Shit aint fair. I protest.
16. Eve ate the apple, you bleed for a week.. but.. Why?
17. Why cant I bust a nut from getting head? Hmmm.
18. Why do I have to wait until payday to get what I want?
19. Why does Greg like light skinned women over anything else?
20. I dunno...you tell me.... WHY!?!

Swapper sex for Swagger: Shawty want herself a baller

In all my conversations with women, one of the most confusing things in my mind is how they can reduce all their standards once a brother signs a million dollar contract. I know female who hated sports, but whenever she caught me watching sportscenter she would go crazy at the site of any black man in shorts and a jersey.

It’s call groupism, and its running through the nation. Take Lil Wayne for instance, if he couldn’t rap he would have a desert dick. Dryer than the Sahara. But he rhymes so well and his jewlery is so blingy. Girls flock to him. Once while in a night club at ATL a pair of panties almost hit me while I was standing in VIP with my shades on, sipping on a drink and looking at the people who weren’t in VIP. And no the panties were aimed at a multi-platinum rapper and a few ball players who was there with him.

Needless to say girls still dream of bagging a ball player, a man who will never be home, and rape hotel attendants on away games. Then give you a 40 karat ring to keep you quiet, submissive and docile while he drops a double nickel on my beloved NY Knickerbockers.

I’ve read that the best place to meet a ball player is while they’re still in college preferably @ a Big Ten, ACC, or SEC school. The summer league games are cool too but if you want to be more than a jump off avoid the clubs. I was in awe at the fact that there seems to be a handbook on how to bag a cash cow. The worst part about it is, I don’t even blame the ladies, I blame the dumb ball players who splurge on these females… The same females dudes like myself get with for free. Do you Playa!!

This infamous "Tell facts about you" Note on Facebook that I hate....

I guess the more I get tagged, the more I write, right? Okay. Great.

24 Facts. I'm going in.

1. I'm determined to have my own place by 2010. No reason I should'nt have one.
2. But like number 1.. I spend too much damn money. I'm going to stop. I promise.
3. I have 87 fitted hats...and counting.
4. I'm on the verge of paying all debts, and by April, I should only have one banking account. Right now I have three different ones. Not good..
5. I used to have cornrolls. Sickening, I know.
6. I've been drinking 7 bottles a day.
7. Before Lauren London.. there was Aaliyah. No in between.
8. I work at a Law Firm. Major? English. Picture that.
9. My drivers license photo looks like a convicted serial rapist.
10. I have no car. Metro. My life sucks. sometimes..Hard knock Life.
11. I listen to "Blackberry Mollasses" everyday at least twice.
12. Wrote a 12 page paper on how AIDS was given by monkies, so obviously a human fucked one in order to catch it.
14. I will never be president, but I'm determined to run SOMETHING.
15. Kids I want: 3. You have to have the "odd child" to balance it out.
16. I watch Ferris Bueler everytime it comes on.
17. Jo'el and I take some nice photos together. Yay.
18. Dee told me once "Greg, you care too much about these bitches". Stuck with me.
19. Not a big Bill Cosby fan... but I live by his motto. "I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody." - Bill Cosby
20. I've always been scared of not waking up the next day. Something strange bout it.
21. I'm going through my evolution period.
22. Admitted porn watcher.
23. Rather be rich than famous. I'm about the checks. [asian lady] "C'mon gimme monay"
24. Deer Park > Aquafina > Fiji

Introducing Honeybun

let me introduce you to Honeybun. Might as well before you think shes my girl. She aint. But jive like if opportunity knocked.. yeah. First female I've met who's wit matched mine. That and she's educated. My god. Now sure, a lot of females are in college, and many have degrees.. But "this shit right here nigga'...

I met her when we both were fascinated with the sidekick craze. Granted I had a girl then, so we both patened the "brother/sister" phrase. Actually panned out well mainly because neither one of us wanted nothing. Now when I seen her body and frame.. Must admit, I had ideas of traveling to her location and possibly penetrating the fuck out her. But nah. Something made her different than a one nighter.

I remember it like it was last night...a year and a half ago.. when I had a conversation with her about.. you guessed it "people". Those people being people on the site we used to be on. And how people live a facade that they arent. She said something to me that stuck.

"What can they tell you? You ain't real? Say what you mean and mean what you say"

Reason why I say this in the blog is because this shit..My blogs are meant for you not to understand. You may hate it, you may love it. Thats the art of argument. So when I see people feeling my words, I love it. When you dislike it, I take it into consideration, and continue on with my motivation...myself.

But thats neither here nor there. I really wanted an excuse to post her photo. Shes fucking gorgeous.

-And she proves that not ALL the women I interact with are light skinned with long hair. [even though she just recently chopped hers off].

Back to business... See y'all in the next blog. Oww.

Shit that urks my nerves. [Slight Facebook Tangent]

Dumb shit. Caught myself fighting back going on a tangent. Fuck it. Look for yourself.






And y'all wonder why I'm like I am now? It takes all my will not to jump through my computer screen and dropkick these joints.

Ladies, you just cant do what men do. Deal with it.

Ladies, let’s face it! There are just somethings you can’t do, that men can, Like piss standing up and walk away without wiping it off. You can not be consider domestic, walking around talking in slang and ebonics, cursing, rolling black and milds, smoking them in public. With your black ass lips. If you have issue doing mainly duties, dont try to claim that you are an "independent woman", and dont need a man.

Beyonce is selling you pipe dreams. And you have been swindled.

• If you cringe at the mentioning of changing motor oil.
• If you call a guy to move furniture.
• If you bought a lawn mower, and had to read the instruction manual.
• If you call the hispanics to paint your house, clean your gutters, and other household duties.
• If you consider getting a maid and you live in a studio apartment, or a condo.

You are domesticated.

I concur with the thoughts of "man/women" roles in relationships. I dont necessarily know what it means to be married because I've never been there...yet. However.. KNow your roles, and play your positions in the relationship you are in. Let a man be the man in the situation, and stop trying to turn him into a "house bitch".

-Tis' All.

Randomness that I found to be funny. "Obama Obama Obama"

The Decline in Pursuit...

Yeah. Chivalry is dead. At least via the Internet. Ill elaborate. On the 19th..I was getting to know a female via facebook a little bit more. What's new right? So the conversation goes decent enough to progress to me asking for information of contact outside of facebook. I'm blunt..but I know when to go and walk into opportunity.

Me: Well I guess we'd have to figure out something. Then again, I have no contact info for you at all anyway..
Her: of course u do...facebook!!

The fuck?

Granted...its 8:23am when I check the message, and there's even less of a chance of me caring about shit like that. But my conscience says "is this what they so? Just go back and forth via internet for months attempting to know anything about a person?"

If that's the case I see why so many people fail at the chase and date game. I used to think it was me. Now I'm determined its them. And if you just so happen to think you are one of the many I speak on....you are.

When I explained to Kita the situation...she summed it up in less than three sentences:

Kita: "o tru... She's the bullshitter from hell that's afraid of being face to face with u scared of the outcome???

Precisely. Now its crazy...in the club...women are uptight about being approached. I don't even remember when its been cool to meet a girl outside randomly and book her. They are scared of that. Remember when you could go to a mall or party. See a girl...walk on her...tell her you dig her persona, and she was convinced you were about business? Exchanged numbers and converse? Not anymore. These circa 2000 broads will give you a myspace page.

I'm determined to raise my dating bracket to 26-28 after February. Because they should be peaking on the age where they know exactly what will and won't be tolerated.

I type my life in a blog..however I do not live precariously through a keyboard. Meeting people is my thing. So miss me with that "let's go back and forth in messages". I've got a short patience, and my attention span is horrid. Its nothing for me to move right along. I'd go on and on.. but I figure the pictures been painted by now.

[I'm done. Short blog.]

Dont give your job a reason to fire you today...

LOT of jobs being lost. Today.. 50,000 Jobs were Lost. If you have to... focus harder. You hear?

"When keeping it real goes WRONG..Via Facebook"

Alright. Facebook had a SLIGHT altercation today. I shouldve stayed my ass on hiatus like I originally planned. But let me mosey right along with the scenario without cards being dealt.

I get a friend request from a female that I met off myspace. I'm like okay cool, so I add her [after asking who she was, I clearly forgot]. Come to find out, she's friends with my "sister". I dont know if it was a plot to be nosey, or just mutual friends, but whatever. None of my business. Come to find out, theres two females in my circle that are talking to the same dude. They dont know it, but instead of confronting the dude, they are TRYING [key word trying], to be civil and talk the situation out.

[Dude nowhere to be found at this moment.]

Moving right along.. Heres where the high school petty games and bullshit come into effect. [Main reason why relationships should NOT be broadcast on social networks.] Granted, dc is SMALL. I'm 98% positive I've talked to two females that knew of each other... multiple times, cool. However.. the dating them, and playing claim to them both, never done. So they are under the impression they are "involved" with dude. Dude tells one hes serious with one because he cant get with the other one and the other one isnt about being serious. Otay.. Something I can concur thoughts on. Works for me.

However, instead of being grown women like they STARTED out to be... the bitchfoonery begins. Now I love BOTH these women to death. But I refuse to chose one over the other....

So the facebook statuses begin changing.

Back and forth.. "bitches", and "uglys". And then photos start getting posted of "look alikes" of the other girl with dude. I chuckled a few times actually at the flava flav one. Brought joy to my miserable monday.

But then... Pass interference... Defense. [And im HIGHLY dissapointed in the person too]

The friend swooshes in started putting in HER opinion on the situation. [And a quote from a friend of mine...]

"lol i let the homies handle my lightweight! because the drama that bores me excites the hell out of her "

Regardless of the fact that it had ZERO to do with her, she felt moreso obligated to defend her friend. Which is cool.. BUT.. And I'd probably do the same.. YET... When your friend gives up and says "fuck" the situation, you should take heed and do the same fucking thing. Dont go and SICE the situation, co-signing, trying to add fuel to the fire. I HATE that shit. I despise that shit. Reminds me of them bullshit fights in high school. UGH:

Cast: Shit Talking girl, BF Issues Chick

Shit talker Girl: Man, if I was you, I'd HIT that bitch. Fuck her. You know? I say we rock her ass.

BF Issues Chick: I know right? Man, fuck that bitch, she aint got nothing on me. Imma cut that bitch.

Shit talker girl: Yeah, and that bitch ass nigga too.

BF Issues Chick: Oh fuck him girl, I wanna get that broad. I aint concerned bout him

[PAUSE.]---At this point, your Shit talker is supposed to shut up and just calm her down. But does that happen? NEVERRRRR.

Shit talker girl: Oh nah girl, he need to get it too, he going and fucking other joints. You better than that bitch.. etc etc etc... blah blah blah.. "YeAh, You hit her first, and I'mma follow up!!!"

Ladies.. at this point... your girlfriend is using you for.. ENTERTAINMENT. Shes no longer concerned if you get locked up for stabbing someone. You are just entertainment. NOT a trill friend.

Moral of the story is... Your friend needs to chill and lay low, sit back, and just let you... the one WITH the issues handle them. This is the problem with majority of women. Instead of handling a situation, they will let their FRIENDS dictate how it should go. Put their comments and input in...and not know the whole situation. You, being their friend, should slap HER for bringing more tension.

If MORE people thought like this... the scenario wouldnt be.

• YOU fighting the girl
• Neglecting the dude who will move to the next bitch
• Your friend possiby trying to fuck him next. [you know women like shit they cant have. Whats better than your friends man?.. dont say you wont..then play you wont]
• You getting locked up.

When keeping it REAL.... goes... wrong.

http://www.dumpalink.com/videos/Comedy-When-Keeping-it-Real-goes-Wrong-bcb2.html