Boundaries are for Squares. Open up your Inner Circle.

So, I was reading a blog on my favorite buddy's blog: "The Boundaries Blog"

Feel free to read that blog, because I have a reply to it. Fellas, I try to have y'all back, but at the sake of argument, some shit is fact, some is fiction. So our cards will be pulled. Read on"

First lets break down what "Talking to is".. in retrospect. A Mans version, and a WOMANS version of what she THINKS are his reasons. Granted if someone TELLS you they are trying to get to know you, its stationary they are attracted to you. What people, both male and female forget to realize is we have ENOUGH friends. At this point in MANY of our lifes, we know who we CAN and CANNOT consider to be a friend. I personally feel the term friend is thrown around to blanket the fact that we don't want the person to play any other role in our lifes.

Example: He trys to talk to you, you tell him you see him as a friend. He follows suit and allows you to see him as a friend, in return for a broken heart and a second best label.

Outcome: He will STILL continue to like you, regardless of the men you being attracted to coming in and out of your life. Legitamately, he wanted to get to know you for the woman he saw, not the woman you could become. <--Think women need to re-read that.

What SHE thinks about Getting to know YOU: 1) Exchanging numbers 2) Go out here or there once a week or every two 3) Light convo, likes an dislikes 4) Still figuring out what role they will play

What HE thinks about Getting to know YOU:

• Exchanging contacts


• Explaining his reasons for chosing you/liking you


• Taking you out to prove he's worthy of your time.


• Basic questions every man has asked you, that you're probably tired of re-itterating.


• Suming up what role hes applicable for.

What SHE thinks about Talking to you: 1) Talk to them DAILY or try too 2) Your spare time is OUR time!!!3) We're in LIKE next transition maybe L@??! 4) Where do we stand what's OUR future...do we have one? Could he be THE 1?

What HE thinks about Talking to you:

• He assumes talking to you means he is exclusive. He knows men are in and out of your life, but hes at a postion high enough he can't be replaced. [usually the vital point where dudes get comfortable and fuck up with inconsistency]


• Talk periodically on a DAILY basis. Dont call and talk for hours because you should know enough to form an idea of their personality.


• Knows your +'s and -'s.


• "Here We Stand" complex. Wanting for, but the feeling may not be residual.

I personally think its FUNNY when a woman thinks the reason a man talks to them is because of the things he stands to gain from talking to them. I talked to a girl that swore up and down that I wanted sex from her at all points of the day. So what she would do is dangle it in my face, meanwhile having me handcuffed so I couldnt grab it. I'm not sure if she was fucking someone else, personally didn't care, but I got to the point where me "getting to know her" was going nowhere but to the "friendship" bin. As a resource, I continues "getting to know" other women, and played the odds. To her dismay, she felt as if she was the only one could play that game, yet I was supposed to stick to her and just her..because she wasn't clear on what she wanted to become.

The thing some women do not understand, most men genuwinely want to get to know you for the minor things collectively to become something major. Its a 50/50 thing.

[Pardon me.. My co-worker came in acting as if I was supposed to help her. I'm blogging. Go thaddaway].... Moving right along. Ahem.

Women instantly get intimidated with the term "I'm trying to talk to you". When a man says these words, his intentions to her are crystal clear: hes trying to bun her, hes trying to fuck, or he's trying to be a mix of both.

So when a guy uses his own safety net as says "I'm trying to get to know you" it has more of a cushion for a woman, because she can take the ability to twist his words and twist them for her benefit. Which is decent because you should try to have the upper hand. Cool. So when he does show the LEAST amount of interest in whats between your thighs... Fellas, expect to hear "I thought you wanted to get to know me"

This is simply her way of saying "You can get to know me without spreading my legs". Wholetime she could be having sex with someone else that doesn't even know what classes she took this semester. [even IF that that was one of your "getting to know" question]

Men: When you tell a woman why you want her, tell her everything up front. If you met her, liked her attire and how it fit her, tell her. Shes heard shes pretty before. If she can't handle you being real with her and saying "Look, I like how you look physically, I dont know how smart you are, but in time I'm going to learn." She will take that better than you telling her "you like her because she seems like shes intriguing". 12 times out of ten she KNOWS that her body is vicious, and wore that attire to get the attention that you gave. Just so happens you SPOKE on it.

Women: When a man is honest to you. Accept or decline from the get go. Tell him "look, I'm not attracted to you, you seem like an individual worth knowing, but I have no intentions of showing you the same courtesy". Period. Its basic psychology. If you tell a person what they NEED to hear the first time, they cant be mad at the fact you went out of your way to show no interest. This also works when you decide you are going to show them even the SLIGHTEST signs of flirtation. Keep shit platonic from get go. ALL the overnight visitations, the undivided attentiveness.. makes men believe there is interest there. Show none, of make it clear from the 0:01 second you meet. Problem solved.

MEN: (again..Since women have pussies and hardly deal with rejection as much): Dont dwell off the fact you cant have her. And don't go out of your way to show that you can do better. Make a woman worth your time happy. Its better to continue "getting to know the woman your talking to", then re-reading the DATING INSTRUCTION MANUAL and starting from scratch in repetition.

Tis' All.

Single Women, Shut The Hell Up [Interesting Read]

Disclaimer, this was writen by a WOMAN. I didn't have a blog for today, so I figured I'd share this with the masses. Enjoy:

By Wendy Atterberry

(The Frisky) -- In a recent column on the Huffington Post, "Why I'm Single," writer Lea Lane lists all the reasons that she's still single. Why? So she can send the URL to all the nosy, possibly well-meaning busy-bodies who keep asking her why she isn't in a relationship.

Lane presents a persuasive case; it almost made me wish for the days I, too, had the whole bed to myself. She's one of what I'll call the "Happies," women who are perfectly content with their single status.

They don't want for a companion; they love their solitude and have enough friends, hobbies, and passions to keep themselves busy.

Although, most Happies, like Lane, are "open to options, and do understand the beauty and wonder -- and blessing -- of a good relationship," they neither actively seek one nor passively hope and pray one comes their way. The Happies say they don't need a relationship to be content, and, by God, they mean it.

On the other side of the single lady spectrum, you've got the "Crappies." They're the single ladies with really crappy attitudes. Take, for example, Jezebel's Megan Carpentier, who responded to Lane's column with a list of her own, a list that not only doesn't make me a little nostalgic for my single days, it makes me sort of, well, sad -- for her.

I'm sad for the Crappies, because, as much as they say, like Megan, "I've made my peace with being single because I don't have to pretend I don't drink from the carton or sleep with one of those face masks on or watch 'Murder She Wrote' too late at night," they're whining to everyone who will listen about how much it sucks that they can't find a guy who wants to date them.

They're so committed to not compromising, to not being flexible, to not stepping a centimeter outside their comfort zone, or, God forbid, turning off their guilty pleasure TV, they refuse to actually GO OUT, mingle, maybe even meet someone nice.

No, they'd rather stay in, whine, and have their friends write testimonials on their blogs about why they'd be so great to date.

In an attempt to hide their loneliness from themselves -- because they're sure not hiding it from anyone else -- the Crappies adopt an air of self-righteousness. "I'm probably alone because I dated when I wanted to," they tell themselves, "and got into relationships when I wanted to, and got out of them when I needed to."

As if people who aren't alone are a bunch of morons who got stuck in bad relationships that they never wanted to be in and don't have the strength to get out of. "I'm alone because I eschewed goal-oriented dating and 'trying to find someone,'" they brag.

Because, wow, there's nothing worse than actually being pro-active, particularly when the goal is happiness. That kind of stuff is for losers! That kind of stuff is for self-hating women who subscribe to "The Rules!" Except it isn't.

Ladies, if you're single and truly happy to be so, more power to you! There's no reason in the world you need to make a list or explain to anyone why you're not in a relationship.

But if you're a woman who is unhappily single and would love nothing more than having someone to share your life with, it's time to quit whining, stop making self-righteous excuses, turn off your TV, get out there, and meet people.

There's no shame in being goal-oriented and dating with purpose. There's no shame in opening your mind, being flexible, and learning to compromise. Spread the word you're on the market, tell your friends, tell your friends of friends, let your co-workers, family, and entire social network know you're looking for dates.

Take care of yourself, dress well, look good every time you go outside. Smile at people when you're out and about, make small talk in check-out lines, keep your radar up at all times. You never know when the right person for you will be rounding the next corner.

But bear in mind, YOU aren't perfect, and there's not going to be a perfect person for you. If you refuse to settle for anything less, you're going to be lonely for a very, very long time.

If you aren't prepared to open your mind a little, you might as well stay in with your "Murder She Wrote" and your crappy attitude. But, for the love of God, quit your whining. The rest of us don't

I Feel Like you Should Put Your Pussy On My Face

I feel as if you need to be listening to this song as you read this blog

birthday sex (demo) - jeremih

Song jie like snuck up on me like shit, however it pretty much describes how my summer will be. Now, I'm not supposed to talk about sex for a week, but I feel as if this one blog will suffice for the rest of the week, so I will go ahead and speak on it. The last time I had sex, was good sex. So when I heard this song, I pretty much imagined how I'm going to spend 90 days of the summer giving her impeccible dick. Now all summer I've been reading sex guides, and stragegies for things I should be doing to my sex partner. So she need be prepared. She being whomeever. [Interim..]

I measured my tongue over the weekend, 2.7 inches. Decent right?

Theres a good three women I've said I want to have sex with, one knows, the other two.. I want at the same time. Wild as shit, but I figure fuck it. This summer I'm determined to do the following:

• Have sex hanging off a balcony in broad daylight


• Have sex in front of a peer audience. Yeah, I've done it before, but I was like strategized yet discreet sex. Like those little booths in "Hostel" or whatever, but yeah..


• Have sex in the HOV lane.


• Have sex in one of those "Model" houses and shit. Ditch the tour guide and go into one of the vacant rooms and get real uncivilized. Then walk out like nothing happened.


• Have sex/oral pleasures in Transformers 2. Reason why: None, just sound good.

So a female asked me today via Twitter: "What makes me think my sex is so great".

Never said that. However, I do what I need to do when I need to do it. I am open to suggestions, I take hints, and do surveys. Aint no purpose in fucking someone knowing you can't please them. This is where text messages come into play.

Me: So how you want it done?

Her: However you going to give it to me.

Me: Thats great. So if I just decide I'll give you five deep strokes, pull
out and roll over you'd be mad. Specifics.

Her: Nah, I want it from the back, from the side, I want it ate, thats
mandatory.

Me: I guess I'll be the dominant one.

I ask simple questions, but it seems women get timid when you ask a flat out question. Now.. Granted if I said 'let me eat your pussy, arch over, let me get it that way".. I'd get a stare like "oh, forreal". Yeah, I'm serious. So when I get questioned like "what makes you so sure in bed".. Its the fact that I'm willing to either be the leader, or the follower. Some people just opt for one roll and stick to it. Sometimes I want to wake up to you straddling me. Great, make my AM better. Shit.. I wish I had that shit happening to ME sunday morning. [Yawn*...you know what it is] But the powers that be say.. yeah...

Also.. Moving right along. I have a lesbian friend Arekah, and she put it to me like this: "Its summertime, I'm tryna see some bitches summa time 2nite"

Shit, the WWF aint the ONLY ones that like to tag team. Dig? Dug.

Fin'

Now Taking Them Drake Apologies

Now granted, I tried to tole em. 2005 I was saying it. Fuck... I told em again in 2006. I let them have 2007 when they heard "Replacement Girl" because they saw Trey Songz and shit and figured it was the new hotness. Then In October 07 they heard Wayne going off his tracks, now EVERYBODY on dicks.

Just figured I'd go ahead and get them apologize for doubting me. Granted said the SAME shit about LUPE a few years back. Drake on the comeup faster than Lup' was.. so I KNOW people on dicks.

So yeah, I forgive y'all.

Ultrabar: Ugly Ladies Tryna Really Alter Being A RECK

Told yall I'd do it again. I SWEAR I aint go buy a rack of drinks and have an outrageous tab. I went and got the $3.00 specials. So by the fourth I was like John Legend...ready to go. Moving right along... Arekah...liquid leggings...my lordy. If you weren't so you I'd moufkiss you in public and hold your hand. Wee o wee....like a cop car. <---- yes I've been using this quote in normal conversation. So at first the jaunt was a meat fest. I found myself going to the bathroom just to get AWAY from the rest of the dudes. And the beginning flock of women. I definitely had the "no lord why me" look for a good hour point five.

Then seen a youngin....couldn't be a day over 19...had on some type fashions that must have malfunctioned so her back was all out. And she had an ass tat that lead up her back. Found myself going and saying "if you only had a band". I believe I said this to her.

I saw Ashley and her crew from Trinity U also. Looking just as good as yall wanna look. Oww. Ashley you jie got a trunk on you like a Dodge Caravan. Just round and rotund. Made a man want to pull up to your bumper and just tag you from the back. Your friend I was sitting next to the whole night...yeah..two thumbs. Khalid "holla at me baby"

Now...

• Niggas dappin each other from across the room. Bammas like shit. Like I understand yall boys and shit...cool. However....nigga......nigga....this is NOT the time to give them love everlasting daps. Hurting a nigga hand and shit. Come on now dude.
  

Glasses at night old. Fuck is your ass on, some espionage with a beat type blends? I understand yall need to be seen, I feel the same way. However unless you got xray vision...nigga you jie like look like BLANKMAN...out here cuffing broads. J5!

Came to my attention yall dudes out here wearing them Filas that are imitation Pradas. I guess it aint nothing to it but to do it. However I will say this...won't catch me rocking them thangs like. Got me fucked up like sex on the ceiling.

I aint tryna save dat gurlllllll......some females this dedicated to yall. I like to this some of the dudes are giving yall too much credit. Now granted I'm at LOVE a lot. So I know a bourgie female when I see one. However...aint NOTHING I've seen like the boogie HOODRAT joint last night. Now...aint no shane in my game. If you aint living a nightlife lie...I will tell you. So shawty walks up on me like "what you drinking on?" I tell her...then see the X on her hand. So I'm wondering where she getting a drink from since she asking. She proceeds to ask if I can buy her one. No, butch I don't like you and don't care to blink at you any further.

She pulls out a wad of ones and proceeds to hand me cash. Here's where the hoodrat comes out....her outfit. I don't know the broad to save my life but she had hoodrat tatted on her personality. She came to the club with a do rag on. Her heels were leaning...breath smelt like day old "what the fuck" and her cologne...yes cologne was that reminisces of bad weed and cheap hair products.

TOP THREE:!

"Can I get some coke" - White dude to me attempting to get some white broad hyped up off that shit. I dont fuck with that white girl.. NO FUEGO.

Why she standing there like her pussy airing out?- To some broad standin outside looking dumb

Hey there itty bitty bitches- TO the Asian women coming out the club

Honorable Mentions:

- I'm a hangover away from sleeping with you tonight.
- You do look familiar, wait, whats your name again? RIGHT!
- Yes, I'm the Pinnedherassdown dude off Facebook. Oh you could'nt tell? Check out my GOOD side!
- So this is a model call... your a model, take my number down, call me and remind me who you are, because I wont remember.
- Your top heavy, turn around. Oh...I see there IS work to be done. [lmao. fuck y'all that shit is FUNTY!]

Sometimes.

Sat back and just listened to Bilal and just listened to "Sometimes" for a good two hours last night. It wouldve been a confessions-esque blog but aint nothing I can say that I haven't here.

Sometimes I wonder what y'all REALLY think of me... Sometimes

Sometimes - Bilal

• Sometimes I don't think y'all get me....


• Sometimes I do it to piss you off. I like that shit.


• I'm never the same person 2 days in a row. Not even sometimes.


• Interim...I thought it was cute at the beginning..but now sometime you take shit too far.


• I wish I didn't try so hard sometime


• I should run in the opposite direction instead of walking the same path sometime.


• I miss you sometime


• Sometime I have to doubt what I talk about..


• I wish I would've hopped out the sheets sometime. (maybe I'd keep them around sometime)


• I want to spill out all my emotions, but sometime yall aint concerned.


• I wish I knew my father will never be the man I am sometime.


• I wish I could show up to late for work sometime


• Sometime I just want to be in your company but you concerned about niggas who aint fucking with you.


• It wouldn't hurt to know the effort I dished out was residual sometime


• Sometime I know God puts me on the waiting list for my long list of wants and needs.


• Sometime its just my dick that does the thinking.


• Sometimes I just talk to a bunch of woman not because I'm a player but each has a characteristic.


• I wish I wasn't me •sometimes•


• I wish I wouldve intervened when that girl was raped •sometimes•


• Many days I go to bed thinking it'll be the last night •sometimes•.


• •sometimes• I don't have home training.


• I regret fucking you at the Westin, I care for you way more •sometimes•.


• Money comes and goes but the pace is never steady...•sometimes•.


• I want to win...•sometimes•


• Yet I have to accept a loss..•sometimes•
  
  End of the day, I am just a man... Always.

Tahiry's Video From King Magazine Shoot [Goodbye King Magazine]

I'll have a blog about Tahiry and Je Later, for now deal with this.
If y'all dont know much bout Tahiry, here you go.

Tahiry has the internet going nuts, literally. The New York-bred Dominicana first went viral when photos of her, her apple bottom and her boyfriend Joe Budden, surfaced on several gossip hip-hop blogs.

Soon after, TeeTee sporadically began popping up on Jump Off’s Joe Budden TV. It turns out web heads were more into Tahiry’s curves than hearing Joey warn rappers about putting his “foot in their ass.” Initially limited to brief cameos, she quickly nabbed a lead role-resulting in spiking YouTube views and a buzz of her own, a buzz so deafening that King magazine, XXL’s sister publication, came calling.

Now arguably Joe Budden TV’s main draw, the web star-turned-pinup is splitting King’s last cover with Keyshia Cole. XXL recently caught up with Tahiry to discuss her past video vixen ambitions, the other bad girlfriend, Amber Rose, and whether or not her butt really has a bigger buzz than Joe.


Moving along..




And just an extra something I thought was fucking Hilarious.


Pushing Buddens from jeff on Vimeo.

The Advantages of Having a Blackberry

Found out Lady Gaga has a Blackberyy. This hightens the fact that I love this women.

Now granted, everybody worth knowing has a Blackberry. Stamp that. I officially have been a blackberry head for a year now. Before that I functioned with a Sidekick LX and a Verizon V Phone. HOW I managed having two phones is BEYOND ME. But I love this little thing. Shit actually keeps me more organized than I'm supposed to. Since Facebook released 1.5 and allows all your messages and notifications to go to your Mail folder.. I've been in LOVE. Peep my screen though...

http://i41.tinypic.com/2cxtcgg.jpg

Joint jive fly. I've had NUMEROUS themes on this theme, but I always end up going right back to the default Zen With a hidden today dock because it look a whole lot more savvy. I used to think corporate heads were the only folks with Berries. I was proved wrong. Anyway, I figured I'd make this note short, and just give you a couple of the Applications that I use that I think you need to put into your Blackberry life.

If you want a LIST of Applications Click HERE :

OPERA MINI ; UBERTWITTER ; QUICKPULL ; YOUTUBE ; FACEBOOK ; GOOGLE SYNC ;

SUMMERS COMING: Interracial Summer Humping

Interracial Summer Humping.

After looking at this photo made me come to the realization.. whenever I go to Miami or abroad beach wise... there are a LOT of brothers out there with their Khaki shorts on, snuggled up with a Snowbunny...

And quite frankly, some of them are in competition with the sisters. Yeah yeah.. We love a black woman, HOWEVER, racial barriers been getting crossed for years... Just lately, a LOT of white/mixed/diverse broads have been creeping on the come up physique wise...

Would you wife a Snowbunny?

If I were any Dryer, you could call me dust

Developed a SERIOUS case of amnesia as well as writers block. Wait, isn't that the same thing? Quite possibly. Don't really know what to call it honestly. I'm just going to blame it on the lack of excitement in my life lately. I came to terms with my sister growing up in front of my eyes. Granted I dont spend the time I should because she's a teenager so I know she wants to spend that time with her friends. I was the same way, 5, 6 years ago. She gave up skiing for Spring Break so she could be around them. Heres the catch though...They all went out of town, she stayed home. She could've been in Colorado enjoying the last weekend of the ski season but she opted not to.

Speaking of Ski season, I want to pick up a set of skis for myself. I've been bullshitting and DIDNT get any. I have boots, and all the other gear however. Jacket, backpack, pants, boots, socks, warmers, gloves, mask, goggles, the whole nine. I should've got the end of the season Demos while they were 291, but my money wasnt right so I said fuck it.

I'll only say this because its on my mind, then I'm done with it.

1. If you feel being talked about in my blog is a bad thing.. its probably because you are a bad thing. A lot of the people I talk about know they are who I'm talking about. I dont go out of my way to give a lie when I can state a fact.


2. Sex is NOT the only geared topic. Theres plenty of things I rather talk about, just so happens thats all people READ and comprehend. If you go back to my old notes.. they had nothing to do with it. But I geared my blogs to the people who read them. I'm going to change that. Fuck your feelings. This bout me here.


3. I hate when dudes that KNOW you and the girl have been friends before them tell the girl "I trust you, I just dont trust the guys". I've said this shit, so I'm guilty, and a hypocrite, fuck it. HOWEVER, I came to the conclusion of this... No female, no man is going to give up the people that came before you. Get the fuck over it.


4. I despise my laptops internet not working. I depend on my blackberry and work computer to type my shit. Hence I no longer care about grammaticals.

Its Staff Appreciation day. So I must be nice for eight hours. Pray for me.

T Minus 8 Days.

It's Easier to make her a Baby Moms than it is to make her a Wife"

The topic was brought up about "Living Single". Some say its settling for less, some say you settle for second place. But I feel like you should'nt. Short blog. Lets run it.

Have some of you come to the realization that you may NOT get married. You may NOT find that lifetime partner to share errything with with? Shit sounds sad as fuck but it's a reality not many are willing to accept. Yes, its cool to be under 25, living the Party Life, but at the end if it, How does this reality make you feel? Like how does the thought of growing up with nobody to call your own strike you?

Granted, I'm twenty two now, and a lot of women have started the process already, have a child or two [in some cases more], and I've come to conclude its easier to find a baby mother than it is to find a WIFE. Reaching 25, us men go through our 1/4 life crisis around this age where we wont settle, meanwhile sometimes not want to settle down. Hence why so many single mothers are around.

Marriage is like a lifelong goal of being rich and famous. Everybody wants that picket fence, that golden retriever, the pool in the back yard. But everybody wont get that shit. Why?

• Many people are selfish as fuck


• Even more rather push at blackjack when they have 19 and should fold


• Some find marriage as a social standard.

I do agree with Interim, as her and I talked about this situation, and how she doesn't want kids, nor does she want to get married. I can deal with one, but both, no. You can live with your 39 cats if you want. At LEAST a child should suffice. I'm not calling her lonely for the future, but some people rather take over your life forever, and not deal with the labels and documents and the "quarrels" that come with a marriage.

As a woman pur it, and I quote: There is also a reality when men want that lifelong partner, and the feeling isn't mutual with their lady. Men can be old and alone too

This is true. No need to argue.

My man said the shit perfectly: Who wants to be 50 with a BUN?

Not saying your life is DOOMED if you are single, not saying that at all, meanwhile I can't see a life spent with you and your money being nearly as fulfilling as having someone to share it with. That or just being a "man or woman of preference". Pam Grier gets a pass for being single and 60, but how many people YOU know want to die next to an empty plot? I know I dont.

Before the debates start: The success of the marriages ain't the topic of the blog. Like....that's a whole other can of worms because fact is.....divorce shouldn't eem be an option if you got married for the RIGHT reasons. Many have been married, or plan on getting married for reasons like:

• They see it fitting since they've been together with the person for so long its the ONLY option to keep them to self.


• In the best interest of the family household.

But NOT to be happy.

Key quote: "Its sad when DIVORCE scares people from MARRIAGE"

Just want to get views and opinions about this topic. Feel free to speak your mind. [if any of y'all READ for the CONTENT, or just the LAUGHS...Clearly this aint a blog of humor.

Fin

Convincing with Her Body Dimensions-: She Don't Want to Be Just "Another Girl"

This week I'm trying a "no lying, no holds barred" approach. So if something is said in this note, I meant it.

All honesty, I dont even know where to begin. I had enough alcohol on Friday, that I didn't go out Saturday, night, slept all sunday after seeing "Interim" saturday afternoon. I dont really remember much. Forgive me. Came into work this morning feeling like I had someone stomp on my face with a baseball cleat. I dont really remember MUCH of Friday outside of meeting a lot of females I've met off Facebook, Duane lunching and grabbing some broad in the club, and I actually think I got a kiss from a female I used to be heavy steady with on the 3rd floor dance floor. Don't judge me.

I was told I grabbed one of Ky's friends, who happened to be a cute plump plus sized jaint, and dancing with her. I also remember Tamira's purple dress. Dear Tamira, I seriously considered having sex with you at the end of the night. May not have been consentual because I fell off and I'm sure other niggas are on you this month, but you know how me and you rock. Don't need to say much else about that.

Ultrabar bartender on Friday... Umm yeah, you still a pussy for charging me $68.00 and adding your own 22.00 tip. Next time I see you, its on like Donkey Kong. Quite frankly I dont play that shit. You lucky your a female, and I dont hit females. But I do cock back and launch knuckles at bitches. What you did was a bitch move. You qualify.

Few lessons I've learned about light skinned women:

• We men love y'all and let y'all get away with murder. Regardless of how feeble minded some of you creatures are.


• A lot of you are being used to diversify the black spectrum. In laimens terms, a lot of men are just getting y'all ass pregnant because they are darker than me, and refuse to take the risk of having a dark skinned ugly baby. At least a light skinned ugly baby can end up getting a pass for having green eyes to compliment not having good skin. Its facts.


• When you don't get payed enough attention, its an issue. [Edit] Thats all women. Forgive me.

EDIT: A friend sent me this-

So i read in ur note that some men dont talk to dark-skinned chicks cause they'll have an ugly baby.....My reaction...OUCH!!I appreciate your honesty but not all dark women are ugly and not all light women will give u a pretty baby....

That part wasnt in the note, and not of being in fear of having an ugly baby. It was more so an unbiased statement of men thinking they will have CUTER babies because they are fucking a light skinned women. Men are bigger baby critiques than women.

So I measured my portfolio today. Some of you I have no problem saying your names because you know what it is. And I dont talk bad about you. Jeanetta has made a week schedule for herself, I figured I'd do the same. Right now Saturdays are reserved for Interim. Call her that for the sake of her being consistent. We are'nt anything special, so when we see each other, its that. So bewbew, you have Saturday.

1. Monday: Rest/Relaxation- Nobody has this day. This is downloading porn and music day, also to recover from that weekend I just had.


2. Tuesday: PhatPhat. Would've been Interim, but she graduated to Saturday, and she's the only female that parties on a tuesday, every Tuesday. Usually we go to lunch. Jist of it.


3. Wednesday: Date Night. If theres a movie I want to see, it'll be on a wednesday. Beginning of the week aint good, and I hate going to movies everybody's in. I guess thats why I hate Tyler Perry movies.


4. Thursday: -------. Still open. Guess I havent kept a female around long enough to give a date for this. As of late its been bar.


5. Friday: This changes. Club, bar, whatever. Sometime I'll be nice and invite someone out at like 5pm to hang out. 75% of the time, they had the original party motives as me. This would be "Ms. Pretty Face", but she doesnt keep a calendar, therefore, she gets what I give her. Lately, zero.


6. Saturday: Interim. Stamped. Self explanatory. Then maybe, night outting with or without her. She has that option. On occasion Lauren London comes to town, they switch.


7. Sunday: Dunno yet. Waiting for validation. Keep posted.

Granted this aint a sex schedule. If shit happens it does. I know what me telling y'all this means. If I DO offer the time to a particular individual, it will be like "Oh, what happened to her?" Thats none of your concern. Either you bout it, or you aint. Last thing I need on my conscience is sassing a female who acts like she dont talk to as many dudes as I talk to women. Just being honest. But hey, y'all like being lied to, so maybe I should get on my shit.

Sidenote: One night stands aint shit. I got a call from a person that knows a person that had an inquiring mind. Wild shit, I know. Let me go head and run down the convo.

Me: Whats up? Been a while since you called.

Her: True, just wanted to ask you, did you have sex with [insert faux
name]

Me: Yeah.. Why?

Her: oh, you know she got a recommendation, right?

Me: *pause*...Uhm... Elaborate..

Her: Yeah, she asked ****** about how you were in bed and if it was like you
described in your notes.

Me: Kind of figured that, she wouldnt be the first one.

Her: Did you fuck her again?

Me: Nope.

Her: Why not?

Me: She had dudes she was talking to. It was a night of first, so I figured
why not. Sure she felt the same.

Her: Y'all still talk?

Me: Everytime couple days/weeks when she realizes I aint tripping. I guess
women think fucking a dude once phases us. Im comfortable in knowing I did my
part. She came, I asked for round two, she got it. I have a scar to prove
it.

Her: TMI.

Me: Obviously not enough if she's been going around like David Caruso trying
to find out where my dick been and how it was.

Moral of the story- I hate when females QUESTION the shit I say in my notes. I practice what I preach, and I know the art of my own shit. Stop that.

I'm done. Headache ensues. Bye.

Last Night @ Ultrabar: Bartenders are bastids. You heard me, bastids.

Woke up off a non existent hangover. Picture that. Well....not exactly but fuck it. let me explain why Greg will NO longer drink...at clubs.

Bartenders are some bitches. Especially rookies or jaints that think people won't tip them.

- I get to the bar and say "fuck it...ts happy hour...three dollar drinks...I buy five." one for me...four for some friends I went to school with.. $15.
- when my boy arrives get me and him a midori, his boys the specials....$22
- get one last drink for me and my boy...pussy juice. $20

Final Tab= $68.00

Lesson Learned: Fuck a bar, liquor store.

Mind you I'm supposed to be self absorbed...but I'm generous with it though. Fuck it. ONE day somebody gon be nice. I know plenty people I've got drinks for. No prollem...forward. I see a light skinned girl. We stare each other down majority of the night. Tried to figure out who she was because she was with a female that dressed like a nigga. I wouldn't go and call her gay just yet because all honesty if you took away the baggy sweater...I'm sure the titties sit upright. Cool. Needless to say we stared back and forward but at speak. I wasn't approaching to hear that she's with her girlfriend. Prides a bitch...and I be fucking her.

So I see a friend. I speak, state my name and shit, wow! She's beautiful too. Won't fake...I looked at her body too (sorry Paris) but after my glances I stopped she and I both agreed it was wack around the time. I personally waited on someone to dance so I could groove and break being uncomfortable. Then I see liquid leggings.

Everybody know liquid leggings by now and how I feel about them. So I see her but aint really want to speak...so I just look..she looks back...then I see her phone...blackberry storm. Bam.

Me: your jaint running slow?
Her: yeah what about yours? (shows
her phone)
[extra nonsense leading to exchange of Pins and numbers]...

We in the same area for the rest of the night so we talking on and off. She asked why I wasn't dancing. I personally aint want to say that she was one of few that looked damn good so I just said I was scoping and talking shit from afar. So she gets in front of me and dances. Two thumbs. I'm praying she don tell her girlfriends what DID happen though. Ill tell yall since you asked though. Granted I adjusted myself prior to the dance..and sat it so it would lay on my thigh. Just incase the alcohol fucked with me and I had a hard on...which happened. I wasn't embarrassed...It sat on her back. No harm no foul.

So...I see two beautiful face-ded light skinned woman. Now normally light skinned don't strike me but they looked familiar. Like I saw them off Facebook. So I decided I'd do what is done to me twice already tonight...ask who they are. So I walk up to the tallest one I guess because the one a tad bit shorter was lost in the crowd.

Me: excuse me..what's your name?
Her: name given.. What's up?
Me:
confused, isn't your name like Barbie something?
Her: nah that's my cousin
(points to her) I'm perfection on facebook.
Me: okay I'm greg *pause
...walks away.

Wasn't much else to say...felt like an ass speaking and saying the wrong name. Forgive me love. But you and your entourage get the award for best looking. And Barbie...umm yeah...my friend agree...yeah. Perfection too. Your parents blessed yall. Your kids kids will have good qualities as long as they don't fuck nobody three shades darker than me. I'm dark enough.

Marcus, happy birthday and all that good shit, nice meeting you. Was a party once all the shrek jaints found the dark corridor to hide in.

White folks...HOW do yall get in the club with vans with dirty ass laces? Yall got it great. (look at picture)



Yes the camera phone was out. I came prepared...yall came looking jive ugh..I'm almost hurt a tad at the sight of this.

- Marcus...your thick brown skin friend with the white dress...wondrous. Don't worry...I took a shot so you know who I'm talking bout. Didn't take a picture of her face of course...but you catch that drift....



Okay...the white people are coming...I gotta go be corporate...forgive me. Fin.

How Long is sex SUPPOSED to last?

I've asked a few females this prior, but it was funny to read it on a discussion board that I'm on often. The topic came along:

"How long is sex SUPPOSED to last"

Personally, sex aint supposed to be a competition. Either we have teamwork about the situation at hand, try to give the other person the same pleasures, but some people dont get it. Preferably women.

Enthusiasm has a lot to do with your fucking. A go getter in the bed is always a good thing. Personal preference but I want a female that is throwing pussy instead of just taking dick. Dont run from it. Women complain about consistent stroke, meanwhile are scooting away from the dick every couple minutes. Thats bad business lover. You need to learn that sometimes what hurts you, helps you. The screaming.. unneccessary. If I wanted to hear the incondecsent moans, I'd watch a porn joint.

I'm famous for taking flipping a girl over, grabbing the back of her head and pushing it into the pillow until she she put dentures in the cushion. You feel me? All the moaning is good, the screaming aint eclectic for me toots.

Friend of mine feels the same way:

• Good Pussy: I'll give you 20-30 on the first nutt......second is in the air depending on if I been smoking. Might not catch that second one.


• Weak pussy......Usually like 35-30 before I fake like I skeeted and keep it moving.
  
  
  So he goes on to explain as such.
  

"Just like women do, if a man considers the pussy weak, we wont hit it again."

Like him, I've never been a casulty of not "fitting in", and only ran into a situation where a female wasnt up to par wet wise once, and that was after extended pepetration. Solution was to exit, spit, and enter. Simple math.

Females are good at it, we are as well. When we get a woman with some weak pussy, we don't carry them, just pretty much end up "busy" everytime they hit you up. No need for lube when you are your own natural essence. If you can't keep your body 100 while we are hunching, you probably wont be getting a call back. If I'm entitled to keep a hard dick and a smile, please believe, I must get that same courtesy, and your pussy bets be wet. I've been the type to go and spit on my fingers from the back, wipe it across a pussy and think nothing of it. I aint gon hawk spit in it like a porn star. I'll keep it civil.

Conclusion, regardless who you're with, the first round should be a good 20-30 minutes. Now.. that timeframe has to be full force, going HAM in the pussy. No bathrom breaks, and it doesn't include the exchange of oral. All you women asking for long time loving are senseless. Think about the math. The force I'm going in that 30, you came 5 times, orgasm once, and working towards your second. However with your 1 hour R&B dick, you came twice and waiting for more because he wants to go and fuck like Ne-yo described. Sorry, must be nice, but I put dick down nice.

Moist Satin Sheets: #3 Slow & Steady Wins The Race.

She told me come over when her daughter left for the night. I love me an older woman. Granted her kids my age...the experience she got it what I want. I bee. Thinking about fucking it all day long. Bulge in my pants tell no lies. At work drawing strategies of things I'm trying to do.

Call her Foxy Brown. Pam Grier like, titties sit upright. Had a kid but her body doing fine. I know I can't demand too much of her because they still live with her. So when I get the chance I know she goes all out, eager to please. She's a thinker in the bedroom. I remember once she pulled over on the interstate, told me to drive as she serviced me like a Pep Boys in the hood. Must admit I came twice.

She likes having a young man so I give her what she likes. In return I get the experience. She puts her leg over her head with ease. And likes to suck her own titties in missionary as she wraps her legs around my chest as I dig up in it.


So I pull up to her house. Lubrication, trojan protected. I call her tell her I parked on the side and let me in. She shows up to the door with Nike body gear and a sports bra. Mustve just in from the gym. Since she's not married her bodys extra tight. And I can see her pussy print in the spandex just throbbing to get its own workout.

"Baby I'm thirsty grab something to drink." Now before me..she was all white Zinfandel and wine coolers. But I've put her onto the "Midnight Menu". So I go and prepared the sex juice. Malibu pineapple and grey goose. Got the recipe from a friend...so let's call it "pussy juice". I took her the cup, she grabs. She sips and says to taste it off her lips. Sometime being an eager student is a good thing so I indulge. Sneaking tongues in our mouths she softly moans, clinching closer..her heart beating from her now naked chest, breast sitting upright, nipples poking my upper body.

I walk her over to the staircase and push her towards the wall. Putting her hands above her head, she submits to my whim. Sucking her breasts, playing with each between my fingers, licking the sides...the nipples, underneath the cuff, I kiss her heart. I feel her soul dancing. She moans "baby I'm sweaty let me get in the shower".

I take her to the bathroom and put her on the counter. She starts getting undressed as I turn on the water. She gets in, and asks if I'm joining. I reply no because I have no change of clothes. She grabs me by the collar and starts kissing my neck, and licking behind my ear. I in turn kiss down. Her chest as she leaves wet footprints on the back of my t shirt, titty prints on the front. Tangled in the shower curtain she rips them down midway through us kissing.

I turn her to the tile on the wall and face her towards it. Arching her back I grab and bite at her asscheeks while she moans passionately. I grab the showerhead and start to run water down her back. As it trickles down, I lick between the drops, pussy and moisture mixed. Gradually moving the showerhead to the front, I turn it on and rub it against her pussy as she digs her newly manicured nails into my shoulder.

"I have to shower" is what she replies, so I hand her the washcloth and her Dove sensitive skin body wash. She looks at me, bites her lip, and squeezes a dab of it on the cloth. Washing from her neck to her breast to her stomach...I watch as this specimen of a woman teases me, naked and foamed, like a starbucks delight. She in turn takes the shower head and rinses herself, rubbing the showerhead on her lower region before asking me to get her back.

I put one of her legs on the soap dish, the other on the ledge and begin to wash. I scrub slow, looking at the tattoo on her right shoulder that connects to the front. Licking the side of her neck...she wants the tongue. She turns, rips my shirt off and unzips my now soaked jeans. I pick her up and carry her out of the bathroom. She prefers to airdry so I put her down near the bed. She gets up and pushes my head back towards the mattress with her index finger.

Pulling it out she start salivating for my dick. She kisses the shaft. Mesmerized at it at full attention she licks the head first. Sticks her tongue in the slit. Makes sure she rubs the balls with her left hand. With every move of her mouth I retaliate with groans. She's experienced. Sucks the head just right, nibbles on it, and licks the sack as well. In a trance I feel obligated to return.

I get up and tell her lay on the bed. She does. When she spreads out...I pick her up in mid air and eat her pussy standing up. Clinching my head with her inner thighs...she cuts on my chin and tongue. I stick my tongue inside the love canal to taste more. She grabs the dick in anticipation for sucking. She goes to town as she grabs my waist and goes at it no hands. I pull her down when it gets too much and arch her back over the bed.

Going for it we are penetrating. Fresh out the shower...her pussy is soaked and now creaming on my dick. I push her into the comforter and tell her put her legs together. Grabbing each cheek, I grind slow and in circles...letting her feel every inch as I lick down her spine. She feels a tightening in her thighs, cliches the pillow close..and explodes all over the bed.

I flip her over and lick it off...

I remove her towel and start to work on those satin sheets....

Jay-Z bagged him an EARNER in Beyonce

Beyonce, Jay-Z Earned Combined $162 Million In 2008
Britney Spears brought in just $2.25 mil, according to Parade magazine's celeb-earnings list.

By Gil Kaufman

Talk all you want about how Beyoncé's husband rakes in the bucks, but Mrs. Sean Carter is doing just fine on her own, thank you very much. As part of Parade magazine's annual "What People Earn" issue, it's revealed that Beyoncé banked a remarkable $80 million in 2008, just $2 million less than Jay-Z.

Also included in the random sampling of celebrities in the issue was funnyman Will Ferrell, who made $31 million last year, edging out actress Jennifer Aniston, who took in a not-too-shabby $27 million. It was also a good year for Ferrell's former "Saturday Night Live" castmate Tina Fey, who was paid $4.6 million for her work in movies and as the creator/star of "30 Rock."

And though she's now in the midst of a career-reviving tour and has a hit album on her hands with Circus, Britney Spears was not yet ramping up her earning potential in 2008, during which she took home a modest sum (for her) of $2.25 million. Banking twice that much was country-pop sensation Taylor Swift, who brought in $5.5 million.

It was clearly a good year for actor/director/screenwriter Tyler Perry. The "Madea" franchise mastermind amassed an amazing $125 million with his hit movies, plays and various other entertainment ventures.

Proving that crime doesn't pay, the impeached Illinois Governor Rob Blagojevich — who allegedly attempted to sell the Senate seat once occupied by President Obama — made $177,400 (at least that we know of). Another governor who chafed under the harsh spotlight in 2008 — and who was seriously lampooned in the new Eminem video — former Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin took home the not-too-blue-collar sum of $125,000.

That sum was a bit more than one of the country's newly minted heroes, airline pilot Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger, who safely landed a plane on the Hudson River in New York. He earned a modest $100,000 last year.

Frankly, all of these celebs combined couldn't hold a candle to the biggest celebrity earner of the bunch: iconic doll Barbie, who amassed $3.3 billion in her 49th year.

One-time (supposed) Madonna boyfriend Alex Rodriguez had a perfectly good year, with a $34 million paycheck from the Yankees and various endorsements. But that's nothing compared to golf deity Tiger Woods, who made $110 million during a year he mostly spent rehabbing from knee surgery.

Other celebs on the list were TV host Kelly Ripa ($8 million), actor Patrick Dempsey ($3.5 million), billionaire New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg ($1!), racecar driver Danica Patrick ($7 million) and radio host Rush Limbaugh ($38 million).

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1609004/2...s_beyonce.jhtml

Second place always got a whole lot to prove

Currently I'm kind of torn between this Pleasure P "Boyfriend #2" song.

Now granted, I understand what the memo was trying to prove on the track, so I just asked some women..

• hes basically like the back up joint
  when number 1 aint there or fulfilling ur needs....just call him


• I guess its someone who provides emotional support and/or friendship... and sex.. with the agreement that there is no commitment b/c you have a #1 in your life... so basically they know their role...

These were pretty much the jist of the argument. So a guy responds perfectly to it.

Ain't nothing but a side joint. Bitches juss try to claim u as bf #2 to feel less ho-ish but eh.. to each's own..

Can't even fault him for it, because I kind of felt him. My initial reply:

"basically her main nigga aint making the pussy happy, taking her on dates, spending time, so she gets somebody else to do all the dirty work, while the main nigga reaps the benefits, and she prolly wont even leave dude.... "

The fucked up part, dudes are excepting this. I was having a conversation with Semora yesterday, and we have it damn near daily. And it came out as so: "You cant be giving out good dick to everybody all willy nilly."

Boyfriend #2 aint shit but "Friend-e-fits". Somebody who knows your situation, but honestly don't give a fuck about it. Granted, this may be the same person who tries to grab that cape and save you in the time of need, but in all honesty.. You can't save somebody who's already been rescued.

Example: She got a man. Y'all talk, she tell you all their business. Tosses you some pussy in hopes that you'll remain close. You all do. They break up, she comes running to you.

• Don't do it. She/he cheated on their spouse, and "rantoldthat" to you bout it. They aint in your best interest.


• Once a cheater, always a cheater.


• I take that back because I cheated once, sue me.

So what I did was asked a SINGLE friend of mine. [The one who pretty much told me to speak on this topic]. She agreed with me. We both hate it. Now seeing as two single people who hate the friends with benefits, boyfriend #2 thing, it makes sense. Now.. I asked a girl in a relationship via Facebook, her response...

"I dont see anything wrong with having a friend. He's there to uplift my spirits and be there when my man isn't"

WHAT type of fluids do some of you women drink? Starting to think its petroleum because someone's gassed your heads to believe you can have your cake and eat it. You can't. Fucked up part of the cycle is they DESPISE when a guy does the same thing., and ACKNOWLEDGES the "friend-e-fits"

I dont know ANY dude that wont take up an offer of friends with benefits. Period. I know some that have caught feelings for the female, but she insisted she didn't want a relationship and liked the way things were working. UNTIL... lol.. until she realized:

1. He had every right to pursue other women and possibly fuck them.


2. Aint shit she could do but live with the fact she was offered a full benefits job, but insisted on working part time.


3. He/She has flipped the scenario and worked it in their benefits.

With that said.. how do YOU feel about Boyfriend #2?

Wise Words from a Decent Man

I'm impressed. First blog on the new site and I hope you are too. Still some things that need to be fixed on it, and this is the "working" layout for it..so forgive the construction.

Remember back in the blackplanet days...instead of saying you were too lazy to fix codes on your page "under construction" was your bread and butter? Lol.

I don't really know where to start so whatever. Basically I've been busy the past few days, dealing with family things as well as finishing up ski season. Yes black people ski. Hate ignorance when people act like we don't. Next conquest is white water rafting. I'm diversifying..

With the blog comes with new outlooks:

• » All women I once talked to...done. A man needs change, and can't do it with the same cast. Think of the original three "American Pie" movies. The first three were cool...but some shit drags on too far.


• » Sex. While there will be plenty, some shit will be kicked back to avoid hurting females I'm currently inside of.


• » "I don't want to be a casualty of your blog"...I don't strive to put you out there. Period. So in all fairness names are withheld. You know who you are. Simple.

Moving right along I've learned a lot from this ski season...maneuver well and try not to trip over your own feet. Stay focused on the next three moves. And it works in life as well.

In the transition of the blog, all the old shit is there. Let me tell you my motivation:

Dee: Even when you get on my nerves, still my best friend on this planet. I finally started LISTENING to the stuff you were saying, and its gradually making sense. I love you gree-dee. Enough of the soppy shit.

Netta- love this woman dearly. If there was anyone who thought like me and could share interest in things its her. She was my original reasoning for blogging. I love you buddy.

Aaronica- she actually helped me put this whole thing together. Without her this would be strictly blogspot. If not facebook notes. I suggest you read her blog because she updates daily. So when I don't..she's there.

Devon- fashion citizen. Met him off twitter but adopted him as fam off the break. In a nutshell... Haute couture.

Semora- Yes, you made the cut too. lol. Crazy enough, you endorse me and have a LOT of new insight to the things I know now. Preciate it.

Bianca: Yes, even you. Lately you've been around, either for arguments, or even just being the person I'm on again off again with. Have to get that together interim...
______________________

Let me get this out too. All the women who didn't want relationships, bullshitted, fucked just to see if I was about what I wrote..thanks. I used to think you were meaningless outside of the physical, but my wit is tested daily with you all. Luckily persistence is a dish I eat ONCE for leftovers.

Speaking of not wanting relationships... But wanting the benefits. Peep this. It won't fly. You WILL pay for your meal. You WILL get a student or child ticket to a movie. And if you get mad...charge it. I'm pulling rank and quite frankly...friends don't pay for friends shit. I'm being courteous.

Fuck buddies...I'm learning to love them. Since women insinuate they like the benefits without the work...pretty much a part time job...yes.. I'm now am equal opportunity employer. If woman and sex are a synonymous name.. "temp agency" works.

- fucking a man who has a girl..sure its fun..until you realize...your on a sinking boat.
- your on call. Matter fact..text. Side booty gets characters..
- affection minimal. Hugs...cuddling? You better grab that pillow and cling close. Won't be NONE of that...round here.

I have to conserve...so tomorrow...keep posted.

Fin

"I Want You All to Run a Train On My Face"

First off, good morning, hope your weekend was exciting, because its Monday. You realize we have a whole five days of entertainment before the weekend right? [sadface]. Prior to my Colorado venture this weekend to end ski season, a few things should be said.

• The new blog should be launched next Monday. Not today, but next Monday. So far it's progressing well thanks to the help of Aaronica. I think you need to check her blog out as well. Seems like her and I have similar interests and talk about relatively the same things. Of course mine have a strong gear to sex. I'm trying to stray from that a little bit and talk about some settle things that actually matter. But the format wont change. However check out Aaronica's Blog


• I'm attempting to have my hands in more than one pot. So far I have:

1. ThankMe-Later Blog


2. His & Hers Show

That's out the way, moving right along. I've come to terms with nightlife, and have made an agreement with the "club scene"

• I refuse to spend $100 every week or two on a new "outfit", just to wear once.


• I will cut back my alcohol consumption. Spending $80-100 a weekend on alcohol is a travesty.


• I will no longer engage in late night "sweep calls". I received a text at 12:18am at Love from someone I haven't talked to since September. Comes down to it, her and I were heavily having sex, until she did what most do, find a steady man.

Obviously getting the text message meant one of two things: Either the two of them broke up and she's trying to get back into the mingling single world, or shes just bullshitting to see if I'll bite. I didn't. Told her me and E were at the club and had no intentions of cutting the night short. Needless to say now I'm probably not in her phonebook anymore. I don't care. Sadly mistaken if you don't think I can't find better. I've had good pussy, bad pussy, pussy I've regretted, and then there's "her" type of pussy. The "Shooting Star Pussy"

Shooting Star Pussy (n) [Describes a person, a place, and sometimes....a thing]: Sexual intercourse every once in a while you wish for, yet once you get it, you remember the main reason for why you don't take the effort to pursue it.

I think women call the male version of this something too. I've heard "stalker, hawks..you get the idea".

I also seen one thing that I could respect..at an 18+ club. I'm almost scared to say it, but yeah. Chest tattoos are the new "thing" now. Last summer women tried the foot tattoos, until they realized that majority either had fat feet, or just didn't have the funds to maintain their pedicures. So this summer the new "location" to have a tattoo is right above your titty meat. Not right directly ON it though. Remember like 10 years ago when everybody mother had that ugly ass blank panther with the red claw marks in one of three locations?

1. Titty


2. Thigh


3. Arm

Not sexy.

Public Service Announcement. Dudes, if you see a female you like at the club, tell her. One thing I hate the most is a nigga that will walk around the girl all night and not say shit. [Calling myself guilty as I did this with Tamira minus the walking around her, but for some reason.. it still panned out. Picture that] Hi Tamira...

But back to topic.. 18+ nightclubs. Second time I did it. In some cases it was good, some cases it was bad.

Good:

• Saw girl I went to high school with, granted I didn't pay her much attention all four years, regardless of us usually sitting behind each other in EVERY class. But at 22...she could get it two times everyday, and four times on Sunday.


• Walking around with alcohol while everyone else can't. Must say, it's empowering to have my pick of women due to the fact they know I can drink, I'm older than them, and everyone knows young women have a tendency...yeah.


• Seeing a joint that you wouldn't talk to as a senior in high school because she was a sophomore. Priceless. "Are you [insert faux name]? My have you grown.

Bad:

• The music. I don't know if its because of the young djs, the dude on the microphone walking around chanting like Khalid, or the fact that the DJ is so siced to be playing at a nightclub that they only play 35 seconds of every song..But it was annoying.


• X Factor: So many lovely women, until you realize they have that X on their hand. Its not a bad thing bew bew... however your body, and the birth date on your ID have me contemplating many things. One of them being "Am I going to have to sacrifice my Saturdays of getting literally fucked up because she can't get into the spots I'd go?"


• Energetic Dudes: I literally thought one dude was going to do a back flip in the club. No bullshit.

Adams Morgan at 1AM is a WHOLE OTHER STORY. My god. You have to be LUCKY to pull one. Because this is how it works being a dude standing on the sidewalk at Adams Morgan. And how things look.

Sexy female with her gay friends, ugly female with a phat ass, ugly female with a bamma ass nigga, sexy female with her man, that drunk bitch that walks up and down to show her outfit off, sexy female with her sexy friends minus that one joint that mugs everybody to make sure NOBODY tries their hand.

Then.. I said fuck it.. I tried it. Seen a girl with liquid leggings on. And everyone knows how I go when I see those. E and the boys can vouch for me. She walks past, her friend behind her, but I aint eem care:

Me: Thank you for pulling the liquid leggings off right. Giving women something to strive for.

Her: [STUCK faced because she thought I was going to be rude or harsh. She turns around, smiles] Aww, thank you, I be trying.

Me: Aint much to try from here. But stay classy.

She looks back one more time just for validation that my outfit was cool, and the niggas I was with were just as cool. We are. But I had to let her go, because the white women on the opposite side of the sidewalk starting talking in Ad-libs and shit. Funny as it was, I told E "DAMNIT, I wont see shawty again [even though I did]

My fingers sleepy. Part two later.