Masturbation stops you from being satisfied by ur partner?

Friday, September 19, 2008
Iono...its Friday, and I got some personal shit going on family wise that got my brain going in a good four, five different directions. So pardon the bluntness of this joint. I had a dream this morning that I went back to my elementary school for some strange reason. And all the nice teachers retired, but those evil ass motherfuckers were still there. Sound likes a typical dream for me. But I know for a fact my 6th grade teacher got to be like 67 years old.

Anyway, I had a status up yesterday that went on the lines of 'if you masturbate too much, you won't be able to be satisfied by your partner'. I guess that's why every time I have sex, it last 43+ minutes. I can't remember the last quickie that didn't last longer than your favorite TV show. Maybe I just fuck real patient. Sometimes I have to force it by fucking the person like I hate them (aggressive thumping)....but yeah, that's beside the point. I don't see anything wrong with masturbating. I produce nut every 34 seconds. My lower region is a little sweatshop of sorts (bad analogy but still). I personally don't think masturbating to porn or whatever is the cause for lost sex drive. Only time I lose sex drive, is when a woman’s sex is dry outright boring. Sure, I love hitting it from the back, but that shit get boring after awhile. Wrap your leg around your shoulders or something, try something new.

Next girl I get, if she got a problem with porn, its going to be interesting watching me give her business. Because 9/10ths of the shit I learn is from the wild ass flicks in my collection. Imagine how frustrated you get when you don't let one off. Shit...I tried to go a week without doing it... Man I swear, I was evil. I couldn't put my hands in my pocket as a result. I would randomly have a witty or smartass remark for everything said. I kirked on Jose' when he was like 'I'm bout to go over youngin house and give her the business'. I said something along the lines of... 'I know you aint getting it, I hope you don't get it, I pray you don't'. Yes, I'm a hater when everybody else fucking and I'm in the cut just spectating.

That's why I couldn't stay in dorms at college. Man, can you imagine all the pussy getting vaginalized? On a venture to Marymount a couple weeks ago to visit a partner of mine... We sitting there getting ready to leave out for Clarendon B., and this nigga partner in the room beside us.... Fucking some random joint. We knew it wasn't his younging because she goes to school in another state. (Oops.) So like 3 minutes later (didn't last that long, because we play Madden in 8 minute quarters, and clock said 4:37 left. So I'm sitting here like 'no this nigga DIDN'T get the opportunity of a lifetime, and just royally last shorter than a music video.

So me.... The asshole of the group was like 'man.... This gotta be the ugliest, phattest bitch this side of the western hemisphere. So we just laughing it up, and eventually they come out the room for her to leave. (No shower, no wash up, nada...) But she came out.... Bad as shit. And I know you aint supposed to fuck joints your friends fucked but... His shit doesn’t count. He teased her. Anywho, she walks out the room, head down because she was like 'aww man, his boys out here'...

But me... I was like 'I know baby, don't be ashamed, I would've tickled your belly button from the inside.' She started chuckling, and this light skinned nigga is like 'Greg, come on dog, I gotta take her home'... Fuck that. You trying to tell me her ass (which ended up looking decent because she reminded me of Kyla Pratt...owwww) looked THAT good, and you lasted three minutes dog? Couldve at LEAST let the Madden quarter run out.

Needless to say, if I'm going long because of masturbation....and niggas only pulling 3-8 minute rounds... Something aint right. Nigga was like 'man, I aint have a chance to test the pussy out, she was just throwing it back'....

Aint that what she supposed to do? Illegitimate.... Please tell him how we feel about that...




Exactly.

All men know when we expecting some action... You supposed to pull one before she even get there. It relaxes you. Females, I'll explain. You come over a dude house, or whatever the case may be... The proper thing for him to do, to avoid him hassling you about the pussy... Is let one off before you touch down. It works two ways. If you DO go and give him the twat, he's going off round two already (who hasn't cheated on a test before??? Exactly) so he's not going to give you that *cough* shitty quickie. Secondly, if you don't give it up, he won't hassle the shit out you. Point blank period.

Niggas. Take my advice. Get to work. It pays off in the long run. And I have been doing it since I was 11. Ten years strong is a good thing. Females... Rub your sexual slit too. Aint no problem with double clicking your mouse. Because we enjoy that shit. Especially if you look remotely close to Lauren London... Oww.

So does masturbation kill the sex? Nope. Not at all. But to each his own. Give me your opinions.

1 comments:

  • SweetestThing

    Lol thats too funny... I've always read that masturbating too much will hamper your ability to come with your partner, which for females is a bad thing since it already takes us a minute, but for men it's not so bad that it makes them last longer...just my opinion